My Daily Actions Anchors Me Down

DAY 3

i have been asked this one question more than once in my life, why do u love to write. the reason why i love to write is because it wont talk back to me, and or wont judge me. also writing brings me happiness, because when i write i get my feelings, and or thoughts out. i dont know if you guys have noticed but i have a really bad case of depression. since i have depression i have learned how to write instead of cut. i am gonna be honest with you i drink and smoke my pain at times but as i go one i have realized the only way the pain will end is by committing suicide. i honestly dont know when, how and or where it will happen but i am so weak it may happen in the future. i have been told time to time that if someone thinks and or trys to commit suicide then they are weak and dont deserve remembrance after death. sometimes i jus wanna see who would actually care if i died, or who would cry. when my close friend saadil had killed himself  because he couldnt handle life. honestly i just wanna put someone in my shoes to see if they could handle it. 

                                              ........ to be continued........