Chapter 1 - When?

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Not again.

I'm not proud of myself or the scars.

And I'm most definitely not proud of what's going to leak through the floor if I don't clean it up.

"Char, can you help me with the pasta?" My mom asked.

"Yeah, sure." I mumbled. I went to the bathroom sulking as I grabbed a washcloth and wiped all of the blood up. I put on a smile and walked downstairs. I held the towel and tried to keep it out of sight, but my mom walked right in the viewing point of the towel.

"What's that?" She asked, a Rigatoni bottled up in her mouth, chewing it softly while she pointed at the towel with her spatula.

"It's that time of the month again." I said hopefully. She nodded.

"The liners are in the cabinet if you need them." My mom said. She acted like this every time I'm here and on my period. After 18 years of living here, she thinks I don't know. Jerome walked downstairs, and he stepped forward, wrapping his arms around my waist and setting his chin on my shoulder.

"Good morning J!" My mom rushed around the kitchen to make breakfast in time for all of us to eat. By us, I mean Jerome, Steven, Taryn, my mom, and me. "How was your sleep?"

"Well," he smiled. "best sleep I've had in a while." I turned my head so I could give him a little peck on the lips. I pulled his arms off of me and grabbed my peacoat and stepped in my Uggs.

"I'm going to Maya's house." I said. "I want to get things right between us."

"Char," my mom said. I paused as Jerome stared at me, then my mom, and back at me again. "Please be careful, J," Jerome turned to my mom. "Go with her please." He nodded and got his coat off of the hanger and slipped on his loafers. He grabbed the keys to his car and we left off to Maya's house. I opened my door and hopped in the passengers side and Jerome slid into the drivers. We pulled out of the driveway and drove onto the main road before both of us even spoke.

"Do you think she's going to forgive me?" I asked anxiously. Jerome lightly applied the brakes when he finally pulled to a stop at the light. He looked at me and sighed.

"I don't know the answer to that, Lottie." he said finally. I reached my hand over the stick shift and grabbed for his. I intertwined our fingers as the light turned green. We drove in silence to Maya's house, still holding hands as we arrived in the driveway. He parked the car and I opened my door at the familiar house that belonged to Maya Lawson. Jerome stood next to me and wrapped his arm around my waist as we stood at the door, waiting for her to answer.

"Lottie?" She spluttered as she held the door open a crack to peek her head out. She opened the door a bit more so we could enter. Natalie was sitting on the davenport, quietly drinking her tea.

"Lottie?" Natalie questioned.

"Yes, it's me." I sat down on the loveseat and Jerome sat next to me, putting his arm around my shoulder.

"So." Maya said, quite loudly.

"We kinda need to talk." I said.

"Where is Mitch, Danielle, Mat and everyone else?" She asked.

"Gone. Montreal, Vancouver, Texas. Been gone since Friday."

"Oh," she sat down. "what do we need to talk about?"

"Us. Our friendship. Look, I'm sorry for what I did and I hope you can forgive me."

"That fast?" she asked. "Hell no! not after what you did to me! I can't just accept it right away!"

"When will you, then?" I looked at her. "When?"

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