Who Insulted Your Hippogriff?

The Chapter of Many Titles

"Yes, at last, ultimate power! It surges through my body, sending tingles up my spine! I finally have the power to find out what's going on! Sadly, my entire plan rests on a rat," James thought to himself, as he sat outside The Three Broomsticks, spying on his best friend. His plan had succeeded so he could now do as he pleased. Deciding to waste his day at the quidditch store, James left.

As soon as James was out of sight, Lupin stopped making random comments, "Lily, there's a rat in your purse," he said calmly.

"What?!" Lily said 'calmly'.

"I planted a rat in your purse."

"What? I'm so confused?" Lily huffed. Lupin stuck his hand in Lily's purse and pulled out a fat rat.

"Wait, is that Wormtail?" Sirius laughed. Lily barely listened to Sirius, and conveniently didn't hear his slight slip up.

"Yes, this was James's brilliant plan to spy on you. He made me and Wormtail help him."

"Wow, I'm surprised, it actually makes more sense than a talking parrot. Though it still annoys me that he was trying spy!" Lily complained, exasperated.

"Yes, well, I thought I should tell you. Although I would appreciate it if you didn't talk about my betrayal, and just said you found a rat in your purse when you trying to get your wallet or something."

"You know, I take back what I said about his plan making any sense! How could he use a rat in my purse to listen to my conversation? There's no spell that can do that. He's an idiot!

"Almost as much of an idiot as a ferret," added Sirius helpfully.

"Well he certainly didn't think things through, but I guess he was just desperate to find out why you guys have become friends recently."

"Oh yeah, about tha..." Sirius started but Remus cut him off.

"It's okay I've already figured everything out down to the last straw!"

"Wha-what how?" Sirius stammered.

"I know things!"

"What the hell kind of answer is that! How did you actually figure it out?"

"I have always been good at reading people and the way they look at other people," Remus said, wriggling his eyebrows.

Lily started laughing at this before asking, "Where'd you guys find this rat anyway?'
"Oh um," Remus stammered, " Hagrid gave him to us, I think his same was Scabbard, because Hagrid saw him trying to eat a sword or something." Remus said nervously.

"And James thought he could use it to spy on me? I don't know how you two can put up with that idiot! He is about as smart a cat that thinks he's a frog!" Lily said angrily.

"Now, now Lily, don't you think you're being a little to harsh?" Remus reasoned, realizing that it was his fault for Lily's current James-rant.

"No, the only way I could ever be friends with a fool like that were if he changed, and proved himself in someway!" Lily said adamantly.