Quotes

Hilarious/Silly Quotes

#1: "When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31." - Unknown

#2: "I'm a brilliant brunette with lots of blonde moments!" - Unknown

#3: "Better days are coming. They are called: Saturday and Sunday." - Unknown

#4: "All my life I thought air was free...until I bought a bag of chips." - Unknown

#5: "Smart cars, smart TV's, smartphones...when will they start making smart people?" - Unknown

#6: "When I feel down and someone tells me to 'Suck it up,' I get the urge to break their legs with a baseball bat and say 'Walk it off.'" - Unknown

#7: "During a test; people look up for inspiration, down in desperation, and left and right for information." - Unknown

#8: "I love how in scary movies the person yells out 'Hello?' As if the killer is going to be like 'Yeah, I'm in the kitchen, want a sandwich?'" - Unknown

#9: "It's funny how when I'm loud, people tell me to be quiet, but when I'm quiet, people ask me what's wrong with me." - Unknown

#10: "I'd walk through fire for my best friend. Well, not fire, that would be dangerous. But a super humid room...but not too humid, because, you know, my hair..." - Unknown

#11: "Old people at weddings always poke me and say 'You're next.' So I started doing the same to them at funerals." - Unknown

#12: "There is no angry way to say bubbles." - Unknown

#13: "Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate." - Unknown

#14: "Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree. That makes it a plant...so chocolate is a salad." - Unknown

#15: "Good girls are found in every corner of the earth. But unfortunately the earth is round." - Unknown

#16: "I think if cops yelled out 'Mannequin challenge!' instead of 'Freeze!' they'd have better results." - Unknown

#17: "I've taken up photography because it's the only hobby where you can shoot people and cut their heads off without going to jail." - Unknown

#18: "They say don't try this at home...so I'm going to go to my friend's house and try it." - Unknown

#19: "Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned." - Unknown

#20: "If you say you're cooler than me...does that make me hotter than you?" - Unknown

#21: "I hate you. And then I love you. It's like I want to throw you off a cliff, then rush to the bottom to save you." - Unknown

#22: "I think my iPhone is broken. I pressed the 'Home' button and I'm still at work." - Unknown

#23: "Someone's therapist knows all about you." - Unknown

#24: "Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues." - Unknown

#25: "I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole." - Unknown

#26: "When your girlfriend is listening to Taylor Swift lyrics on her phone, you know you're either doing something very right or something very wrong." - Unknown

#27: "Is this slow and stupid waitress day?" - Unknown

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A/N:
LOL! These quotes are just plain silly. They certainly make you feel better after crying your eyes out reading the sad quotes! Haha...not funny.

Anyways, comment if you have a funny quote that you'd like to be considered to be featured in this section of the book. Also, if you know the name of an unknown author, write their name down and the number the quote is on. If you'd like, tell me your favorite funny quote, the one you most relate to, or whatever.

Thanks! I'll hopefully be adding more soon!

- E. Gardner