Chapter 11: "You don't want me to go?"

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Kelsey’s Point of View:

“You don’t want me to go?”

Running a hand feverishly up and down his face with his other hand, Justin growled lowly. “I don’t know what the fuck I want.”

“Then let me go.” I suggested but immediately snapped my mouth shut once I took notice to his blazing, hot eyes.

“No.” He snapped, his voice rough causing a chill to run down my spine. Looking out into the sky, Justin took a comforting breath, letting the cool air enter and relax him. Letting his hand fall back to his side after he loosened his grip on me, I watched as he closed his eyes, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.

Biting my lip, I contemplated whether or not I should take the chance and let him diminish or listen to him and stay put.

I chose the second option.

Turning, I stood arm to arm with Justin, holding my breath as the seconds ticked on by. The air around us thickened and I felt as if I was being suffocated.

“You know what I don’t understand?” Justin muttered raspy, his eyes hazed over in a dark manner as he fought to keep himself composed. Not even giving me a chance to answer, he did so himself. “Is that you say you don’t want me to be mad at you yet you do things to get me angry.”

“Justin—”

“Did I ask you to speak?” He barked, his tone of voice slicing through the atmosphere as I stared up at him, wide eyed.

Clasping my lips tightly together, I swallowed hard, my eyebrows furrowing to meet as one in the middle out of confusion. “Why are you acting like this?” I whispered, speaking my thoughts out loud and almost immediately I regretted it. Biting down on my tongue to keep from saying anything more, I inwardly cursed myself taking notice as Justin’s eyes narrowed into slits, practically burning holes into my own.

“It’s a simple question, Kelsey.” He spat, “Did I ask you to talk, yes or no?”

“No.” I murmured, defeated as my shoulders fell. Bowing my head slightly causing my hair to curtain over my face, I took a deep breath.

“Then shut the fuck up.”

Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, I gave a tight lipped nod, refusing to look him in the eyes as I stared off ahead of me.

“You say you care about me, you say that you love me yet the second I turn my back to you, you go against what I’ve always asked of you?” Shaking his head, he licked his lips. “Getting involved in my business is the one thing that you just can’t do. I don’t ask of anything else from you.” Gripping the railing of the wooden outer layer of the patio, Justin sucked in a breath, “It’s dangerous Kelsey… don’t you understand that by now? I can’t risk you putting your life in jeopardy because you’re trying to help me.”

“All you can see is the wrong I’ve done in all of this… you won’t even let yourself see the true reason behind going to Bruce.” Pulling my lips into my mouth, I scoffed in discontent. “It’s like every time I try to do something good for you, you always find a way to twist it into something bigger than it really is.”

“I don’t care what the reasons you had for what you did.” He glared over at me, his eyes intense. “If you did it because you were trying to help or because you think it’s what’s best for me, I already told you, I don’t need nor want your help. I can take care of myself just like I have many years before.”

“You don’t even see what you’re doing to yourself…” I mumbled in disbelief. “You had a nervous breakdown, Justin. You’ve completely lost your mind and nearly bled to death and if you think that that’s you being okay or getting better, you’re clearly delusional.” Taking a step forward, I fought against the voice in the back of my head that told me to stay away. “I know I shouldn’t have gone to Bruce without consulting with you first but I couldn’t let them start something you guys wouldn’t be able to finish.”

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