New life

Chapter 1

The way I see it there are two types of people: the one's who run and the ones who fight. I'm the one who tries to run but when forced to, fight. You may wonder why.This is my story on why I choose the way I do.

Long time ago, I was nineteen years old. The way the smells seemed made me want to hurle. The tree sounds almost made me feel safe in my skin, almost. The people around me started to have a harsh conversation around me. The way they talked made me want to run in the corner and hide. The way of the steps that they made scared me. The way the bells dinged, and the birds chirping sounded frantic, almost warning me as if something bad was about to happen.

I started to ran.

"Miss, are you alright?" A stranger asked me.

"No, can you help me?" I asked and answer his question.

"What is wrong,miss? Is there anything I can do to help you with?"

"Yes. I--my water broke." I said gasping.
"Please save this child," I added. " I beg you."

He helped me in his house and called the doctor. I stayed laid down on the bed in immense pain. I don't tell them who I am even though they want me to say the name so that the child could have a mother. I don't hug her or bring her close to me. After the long hours of birthing her, I cry knowing she must never know me. I decided to name her at least.

"Miss, what is her name before you give her to me?" The stranger asked.

"Eun Jay Sun" I tell him, " take good care of her, please. She must never know about me."

"Won't you regret this,miss?" He questions me.

I don't answer him and just look at my Eun Jay Sun. I know that I will miss her something horrible, but I know that is the best thing for her. She needs someone who would let her live and love. I know that she will look for me, but I would hide and never try to look for her. This is the toughest thing that I could have possibly have done.

The next few days after that was horrible. I finally am able to move two weeks later. As I walked away from my daughter and the person, that day I cried. I wanted to walk back and hold her and give her something that other wise I could never do. Being who I am, I can't do that to her. She would not want the life that would be forced on her. Since the time I birthed her and kept her, she would learn to hate me as all children do to their mothers. This life is not something that she would like to have.

I am not the mother she would be proud to have. My family disowned me for a reason. I am white in an asian town. I had a loving family, but they seemed more focus on my grades more than my happiness. I would try everything to make them happy, but they seemed that my grades would make them happy. The people I brought home to date would be scared off by my parents. Finally, I had enough and got pregnant. When my parents found out, they told me to leave and never come back.

Drying my eyes, I walked away from the village. A king wanted to marry me, but I made the choice to leave before they really did make me marry him.

So here I am. Alone. Unwedd. Lost. No home. And on my own.

I finally make it out of the village and buy a horse to ride. It would be a faster ride that way. The sooner I am able to leave the better. The people don't look at me as I leave. I'm thankful for that. My old friends wait for me at the woods.

"Are you sure you want to do this miss?" They ask concerned.

"What option is left for me?" I say dejected.

"You could always apologize." Katie, a dear friend, said to me.

"Katie, what makes you think saying "im sorry" would make them want me again. It's better for me to leave. You know my parents. They would force me to marry the king and make my daughter live in a perfect hell. What i am doing is just giving her a fighting chance for life. She should not have to be in line for the throne. I had a thing with the young prince and the king knows. He will look for her so i gave her to a lonely old man who needs someone to love. If i had the chance to keep her, i would. I don't have the chance and you know it. As last if I don't have her, she could live. Watch over her for me, please?" I tell Katie.