Elegantly Wasted

Chapter 1

"Zendaya wake up we need to go to school." Shouted Jacob from the door. I snuggled in bed trying to cuddle my teddy. I patted the side of my bed only realising there is a space at it feels cold. I try to blink a little but I was blinded by the shinning light coming through my window. So technically my brother, Jacob opened my curtain then woke me up. How could he ? (Clicks tongue).
I rub my eyes so that I can get use to the Back to school and early sun rise.
"Jacob!....Jacob!" I shout trying to get his attention.
He entered the room moments later with at slight grin. I looked at him in confusion.

" Zendaya, What's wrong now?"

He looks down to me expecting a straight answer.
I stare at him with a complete blank face. I start squinting my eyes trying to hide my tearfull eyes. Try hardly not to blink but staring in his blue eyes brought back all the feint memories of Mother. I go into a deep thought: Feint Memories of my Mother and I playing in the Orchards picking Oranges and skipping. Disturbed in my though Jacob pats my thigh while sitting next to me on my bed. He looks at me with eyes filled with anger, I didn't understand why.

"Baby Girl, What's wrong ?" He asks in a comforting tone.

"Jacob, What happened to Mom? Why did God pick her out of all the people in the entire world. When Mom was here there were barely any Family fights and even all the unnecessary drama. We are here living with Aunty Wendy, because Dad is too busy to take care of us. We, Jacob, we were first in the care of Aunty Laura until cancer took her away from us. We are always shipped around like unwanted kids. We are going to our fourth school ever since our lonely lives started. Jacob please promise never to leave me.... (pour in to unstoppable tears)."

"Shh Zendaya it's is going to be okay. Please don't stress about it." Jacob trying to Carm down my mourning sickness.

This poem slowly repeated in my thoughts every time I think about Mother from the age of 4 years, having to protect myself.

In my thoughts:
Mommy went to Heaven,
but I need her here today,
My tummy hurts and I fell down,
I need her right away.
Operator can you tell me how to find her in this book?
Is heaven in the yellow part,
I don't know where to look.
I think my daddy needs her too,at night I hear him cry.
I hear him call her name sometimes,but I really don't know why.
Maybe if I call her,she will hurry home to me.
Is Heaven very far away,is it across the sea?She's been gone a long,long time she needs to come home now!
I really need to reach her,but I simply don't know how.
Help me find the number please,is it listed under "Heaven"?
I can't read these big big words,
I am only seven.
I'm sorry operator,
I didn't mean to make you cry,
Is your tummy hurting too,or is there something in your eye?
If I call my church maybe they will know.
Mommy said when we need help that's where we should go.
I found the number to my church tacked up on the wall.Thank you operator,
I'll give them a call.

-Poem by Donna Groleau