Can't You see that I'm Broken?

Chapter 4

Cassidy's POV

As the guys dropped me off I started to worry from the car that had been parked in the driveway. He's never home early what's happened My mind wondered. I walked into the house cautiously, just in case he was asleep.

And to just my luck, he wasn't.

He was wide awake and drunk as ever. I tried to sneakily walk pass him, as my dad had his head in the counter and was mumbling incoherent words under his breath. But just as I was about to slip up the stairways. I crunched on a piece of glass that had been thrown at me the previous day.

At this noise his head shot towards my direction. He then gave me a sickly sweet smile saying, " Trying to sneak past me today, huh?" He clicked his tongue a few times then continued, "Oh you see my dear daughter, that just won't do, no, no ,no,no,no." With each word his smile got deeper and his eyes got darker.

He suddenly got up from his chair and strode toward me. I knew today wasn't gonna be good by the look on his face. Before I could even tell what was happening, I was knocked to the floor. Then the words started flying out of his mouth, the words he spoke everyday. Which still hurts me to the very core every time he says it, "You know the reason why your mother left?" He asked me.

   I didn't answer and I knew what was coming next. I felt the kicks going into my stomach, punches and slaps all over my face. He asked once more, " Do you know the reason your why you mother left?!" He bellowed the sound echoing through my ears. I knew the answers to this, he tells me so many time. So many times that i know what he's going to say by heart. I don't want to believe it but, I know it's true. I finally replied saying, barely above a whisper, "She doesn't love me."

He chucked a humorless laugh at my response.

"That's right she doesn't love you, no one does, no one ever will. Nobody loves a mistake. She doesn't love you, thats why she left and when she left she left me with your sorry ass. SHE WOULD STILL BE HERE IF YOU WERNT SUCH A DISAPPOINTMENT !" His voiced raised at the last part, and the beatings started again.

I didn't beg for him to stop. I've learned over the years begging just makes it worse. Crying doesn't help either. When I did cry I got something worse than a beating. Those nights ruined me. So I just lied on the floor there taking it. He didn't stop and I heard ribs break and I let out a silent scream. A stray tear fell out but I wiped it away quickly, hoping he didn't notice.

Gladly,he didn't. I was safe for that day.

~~~~~~~
After fifteen more minutes, when he drew blood and was satisfied, he spat on me and told me to get up and get out of his sight. I tried as quick as I could to get out of his way to the stairs but my ribs made that a lot harder to do. But i pushed through it and I limped my way up the stairs to the bathroom. When I got there, I didn't even bother looking at at myself in the mirror. I knew I looked horrible.

I always did.

So I just cleaned up what I could, bandage my ribs , which took longer than expected, considering he's done worse before. I walked to my bedroom, and al, I wanted to do was plop down on my bed and sleep but if I did I would make my condition even worse. So I slowly got on the bed carful not to go in the side with my ribs and tried to fall asleep. I didn't though because of what my dad had said.

I knew he was right.

It was true.

Nobody could love me.

Not Aaron.

Not Alex.

Not Arsen.

I chuckled mirthlessly.

Not even my own mother.

Nobody loves a mistake.

A disappointment.

No one.