Safe

Prologue

August 20, 2016

August 1, 2006 was the day my life decided to take a huge detour. I remember it clear as day. It was sunny with some white, fluffy clouds sprinkled throughout an orange and pink sky. A mellow aura surrounding the students who had also been with me. I stayed after school to help out with Summer Festival decorations. I thought that maybe if I did so, my parents would finally be proud of me. They already forbade me to call them Mom and Dad and they were barely ever home since they never wanted to see my face. I don't think I even knew what theirs looked like then. I guess if I had to describe it, I had a..distant relationship with them. But at that point I was used to it.

I was at school until about 6:00 when my best friend, Nakamoto Ayane, asked to walk home with me. We told the teachers helping out that we were leaving and were on our way to our neighborhood. We stopped by at a convenience store so I could get dinner and make myself presentable for my parents if they were home. Ayane was also used to my..independence from my parents. She was the only one who really cared about me and promised to have my back no matter what, and I promised the same. We'd been neighbors since our first year of elementary school so of course she'd be there for me. I walked into the store and said hello to Takehara Daiki, the guy who worked there every day. I grabbed the usual onigiri and sandwich and walked to the counter. Like every day, he asked me how school was and if I would ever ask Ayane on a date right in front of her. I just laughed it off, told him school was fine, said some sort of insult about Ayane, and paid for my food. I walked to the back of the store into the changing room. I put my hair up into a hairstyle that didn't look messy. I replaced my junior high blazer with a nicer jacket that I'm sure my parents would like much better on a son they actually wanted. I also changed into some nicer black pants that fit me better. Then, I walked out and right as I was about to leave, Daiki called my name and said, "One day, you really need to stand up to them. Are you really willing to live like this?"

Those two sentences will haunt me forever. Maybe I should have taken his words in a different way. I mean, what does a 17 year old know? He's still a kid too. Yet, I got fired up and angry. He was right. Why was I okay with the fact that my own parents treated me like garbage? They barely took care of their 14 year old son who needed them and seem to feel no remorse about it. What did they even do all day?

I stood at the door of the convenience store for at least a solid 30 seconds. I was facing the counter, clueless at what to say. Ayane grabbed my shoulder and told me that we should go home before it got too dark. I just nodded and exited the store. I remember having a conversation with her about what Daiki said. She told me he had a point and that she always worried for me. That's when I decided I was done. If they ever tried to put me down again I would stand up for myself. When we arrived at my house, Ayane waved goodbye and walked a few meters up the street to her house. I entered and took my shoes off, saying that I was home, but not expecting any response. I put slippers on and headed to my room to put my school bag down, but surprisingly, when I walked by the living room, I saw my parents sitting on the couch, watching TV. They looked over at me and asked what was in the convenience store bag. All I said was dinner and immediately, my mom's eyes widened and she became mad. She got up and berated me for accusing her of being a bad mother. My dad, as usual, joined in the hate fest.

"Do you hate my cooking that much?" "What are you wearing?" "Why are you home so late?" "Why can't you be a good son like the other boys at your school?"

I was already mad at them, so of course I actually decided to snap back this time. I yelled at them, asking why they expected so much of a 14 year old boy, why they never saw my attempts to make them happy, why they always left me home alone, why they hated me so much. And of course, they got even more mad. My dad walked up to me to try and slap me, but i grabbed his wrist and pulled it down. I wasn't going to allow him to add another bruise to my body. I pushed him away and tried to go to my room. Obviously, that wasn't the end of it. My dad screamed at me, "We never even wanted you in the first place!"

My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach and I felt tears forming in my eyes. I swear those words were tattooed into my brain. My entire existence felt meaningless. To think, those were the last words my parents ever said to me. They ignored everything I said to them, grabbed their things, and just left. I was crying, begging them not to leave, but they didn't even look at me. I kept crying and begging until they drove off to who knows where. My own parents abandoned their 14 year old son. I fell to the ground with no more tears, just numbness, for an hour. I sat on my knees on the side of the street, orphaned. I didn't know what else to do so I just walked to Ayane's house. I rang the doorbell and she opened the door extremely confused.

Ten years and I still remember that day so well I can write it down. Crazy, huh?

- Kobayashi Junichi