Secret lovers encoded messages (Wattys 2017)

Chapter 1

  I reached home and kept my bag down on my table and got changed into my pj's and tank tops. I took Tristan's coat and breathed in his smell, it was like chocolate flavour, the same one that he used three years before. I closed my eyes and buried my face in his soft coat and all the memories came flooding back. It was like the memories gave me a powerful electrical shock which made my eyes open wide, red and puffy. No I should not be doing this, it was a long time ago and today I don't know what we are. Damn it, what are we? My phone rang and I came out of my trance, I kept his coat inside my closet carefully as if i was handling a new born baby. I grabbed my phone and reading the caller id a wave of guilt passed through me. Why? I don't know, I received the call -
"Hello!"
"Ashlyn! God why were you not receiving the phone all this while?"
"Umm! But this is the first time I heard it ring!"
" Where does your mind keep wondering? This was the third time I had called you!"
"Ohh, Jeremy I'm really sorry I was studying and I did not notice."
"Okay, just be ready by 7 pm ? Okay? It's weekend so I thought of taking you out for a movie date !"
"Okay! But where is this movie date gonna be?"
"Of course my house ! Bye babe, see ya soon! Love you!"
I wanted to return his feelings, but i could not, I hung up and took out my notebook to read the notes.
     I had slept while studying, I woke up and saw it was already 6 so i hurried up to the washroom. I got refreshed and then decided to wear my boo panda top with a shredded black jeans and a peach pink coat . It was quite cold outside so i decided to take my scarf along with  me. I did not apply any make up, except light lip gloss. I took my bag and the door bell rang. Just in time.
Jeremy kissed me on my cheeks and took me to his car. Soon we were in front of his house. He brought cookies and pizza . A great combination which probably you should not try out. Then we watched films all night and i don't remember when i had slept. I woke up and found something tight wrapping my waist, i looked down to realise it was Jeremy's arm.
His face was settled in the crook of my neck, just like him , i used to wrap my legs around his torso because i used  to feel scared at his house which was huge like Jeremy's house. I tried to fill my lungs with his smell, but instead of the old familiar smell which i wanted to breathe in, the smell of cologne hit my nostril. I groaned and tried to see what is wrong and realised my mistake. It was not him, it was Jeremy. What am i doing? No no no , i shouldn't be doing this, i am with Jeremy and i should be happy that he treats me so nicely unlike him. I need to get him out of my mind.
But no, how can i do that when even after everything he could not do that with me? No what am i even thinking what's wrong with me? I need to hate him, yes i hate him.... just may be.
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Okay i had said that i won't update but i was so tired of studying so i thought of updating the story. See i love you guys so much . Haha, let me know what you think about this chapter and what are you interpreting the story to be about! Till then bye bye, i'll update chapter two, today or by tomorrow! I need votes and comments to keep writing! So do vote and comment !