Welcome to my life.
Call me JJ. Female. 19 going 20 this year. Youngest of the 3 siblings. Chinese. Catholic. Single. Pharmacy student. Not beautiful & qualified enough to be called someone.
Female. I am a girl but most of the time, I want to be a boy.
Why?
Being a girl is quite hassle, difficult and complicated. We spent too much money on sanitary napkins, make ups, clothes and etc. We waste our time alot in making ourselves presentable for ourselves and for the boys. We need to wear bra all the damn time. We got menstruation every f*cking month. We are prone to breast cancer and usually have PCOS. We have mood swings from time to time. We get hurt on our first time! We experience cravings when we get preggy. We look like a whale when we're preggy. We carry the baby for 9 months. We get hurt if its time to give birth. We breastfeed the baby for how many weeks. There's so much more but it's too many to list down.
The point here is, we get hurt all the damn time. And it's so f*cking unfair.
20 years of age. I am getting old. I am getting to a stage where I need to be responsible enough of my actions. I am having a crisis on what path should I go and what career of choice should I take after I graduate which is kind of a 60-40. I really wanna cri. I keep imagining what my life would yet become. I keep struggling. So help me God. Huhuhuhu
Chinese. Let me laugh for a while. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Lots of traditions my friend! I don't know. Maybe for others its different but it depends on your parents and clan. Feng shui, Zodiac sign, Arrange marriage, Small chinky eyes, Math nerd and many more. There's also so many don'ts. It's kind of suffocating. Sad to say, I aint a Math nerd. Sometimes, I feel so small when being compared to other chinese, with the same age as me, who are so good with math. Where was I when the Lord showered that kind of skill? I keep questioning myself.
Being the youngest have its pros & cons. Some youngest are spoiled and bratty while some are not and that is where I belong. I couldn't say that we're well off because we just went through bankrupcy. Everything's a mess but we can still afford to eat 3x a day and that's enough. But, a part of me wants to be like some of the teenagers who could go shopping from their hearts content and travel while I could.
Pharmacy course is aint no easy. We got to familiarize or memorize the Mechanism of Action of a drug, know their pharmacokinetics, know their structure, know their chemical names and uses and many more.
