Female Crush x Female Reader Oneshots

Depressed!Reader

Note: I am writing this on suggestion of @Offic_Paige so thank you for the suggestion! I've never really had depression before, I've only had friends who have had it, so I'm sorry if I get anything wrong.

The swirling abyss seemed to get larger as I collapsed onto the tile floor of the bathroom stall. Right now, the disgusting residue rubbing off on my jeans from the floor didn't matter, nor did the fact that anyone could walk on at any moment and hear my sobbing. All I wanted to do was let out my emotions I kept locked inside me, tears spilling down my face.

I had let myself too fondly think of the times I shared with my friends, or at least, my former friends, from when we met in Math a few years prior until us all hugging each other at the small but often overrated celebration at the end of eighth grade to celebrate moving on from middle school.

Over the summer, I let myself drift apart from them. It was my fault this happened. I shouldn't have told them I have depression. I shouldn't have told them I liked girls like how they liked boys.

Their disgusted and astonished faces filled my mind.

"You're just making it up for attention!"

"You think you're only a lesbian because you're too ugly to get a boyfriend."

"You aren't depressed, you just are ungrateful for everything we've done for you, you stupid-ass hoe!"

The words echoing in my ears overwhelmed my senses, the things they had screamed at me in front of everyone when I tried to go to them and maybe make up with them. They were some of only a few people that really mattered to me, and even the inseparable people I trusted and had a countless amount of times swapped best friend bracelets and homework answers with were slipping out of my grasp. They even thought my crush was weird, while I thought the way she pushed up her slightly cracked glasses were adorable, her high-pitched laugh bringing cheeriness to a dismal homeroom and making my day better and better ounce by ounce. She spoke confidently and passionately about whatever we were debating in Global Studies. We had even studied together a few times, and just when I thought I had enough will to build my life back up again, my friends were repulsed by me like I had Ebola.

I pressed my hands against my face as I wiped away the tears and tried to regain normal breathing. I stood up and walked out of the stall, leaning on the sink as I stared in the mirror at my bloated and flustered face. I didn't want to go back outside, into the harsh world that awaited me full of judgement and betrayal. I wanted to stay in the bathroom, alone. Nobody else to occupy my thoughts except the joy I had once felt every day but now, was a rare occurrence and was replaced by a pit of despair I was struggling to climb out of despite the multiple anti-depressant medications I had been put on to raise my dopamine, however, I needed more than that to patch up the holes being punctured in my flesh.

The creak of the door to the bathroom being opened snapped me out of my thoughts, and there I saw standing behind me was C/N. Her face softened with concern.

"Y/N, is everything okay?"

I stared back into her reflection for a second before I registered that, I had to answer.

"I'm fine." A little too quickly, I snatched a paper towel and began to try and rub the redness off of my face, instead irritating my skin further.

"You aren't fine."

I froze, and I debated what I should do. On one hand, I wanted so desperately to confide in her and be able to finally feel understood; however, there was a chance she could turn on me and say I'm lying for attention.

I decided to trust my gut, and let the words drift out as I dropped the paper towel.

"My friends yelled at me for being a lesbian."

C/N looked surprised, but not in a bad way. Instead, she looked slightly... understanding?

She raised and opened her arms. "Do you want a hug?"

I nodded, and as a few seconds later I laid my head on her warm shoulder and started to let my tears roll down my cheek again, I realized the sinking feeling felt a little fainter.