Anorexic!Reader X Male!Crush

Pt. 1 : Dying To Be Thin

"One hundred and seven pounds" ("Forty eight kilograms"), you quietly mutter to yourself as you read the scale for the second time today. 'You're still not skinny enough... When will you stop being fat?' you thought. You slowly step off the scale, antagonizingly eyeing the blood red numbers reading '107' ('47').  Walking out of your bathroom, you catch a passing glance at your stomach and thighs in the mirror. You sigh loudly while sliding your sweatshirt over your head and wiggle into your dark ripped jeans.

After finally snapping out of thought, you realize you still have to catch the bus for school. "Dumbass!" you violently huff under your breath, whilst shoving all your schoolwork into your black JanSport backpack. You throw your bag over your shoulder and put on your old, weathered vans. Shoes triple-knotted, bag packed to the brim, and self esteem lowered- once again you were ready for high school.

You hear the bus's muddy tires screech to a halt a couple houses down from your cul-de-sac on the hill. "Shitshitshit!" your cracking voice manages to work out, in panic of missing your only ride to school. Both your parents were conveniently on a business trip for the next month, they thought you'd be fine, considering you're 17 (almost 18). So you jog as swiftly as possible downhill to the bus's stop, seeing that other students were boarding the long, narrow, and mustard yellow vehicle.  Instantly you try your best to stop before running into one of your peers, but the momentum from the angled hill sent you sprinting farther than you'd like. You scream, "W-Watch out..!" but you unfortunately fall into the body of someone you wish you didn't.

'{Crush's name}!' you nervously think, you rarely ever see this person, let alone fall on them.  You immediately snap back into reality after your little incident with {Crush's name}, "Oh my god- I am s-so sorry, I didn't mean to fall o-on you, I just couldn't c-control my legs, I must've b-been going so fast. D-Did I hurt you I really didn't m-mean to-" all your words blended and jumbled together, barely making any sense. Although {Crush's name} got up quickly, dusted himself off, and reached out his calloused hand to help you up- he didn't say a word. He was looking down the entire time, but suddenly a faint smile appeared and he said "It's fine {Your name}, don't worry about it!~". A large sigh of relief emitted from your mouth and you grabbed onto his hand, while being pulled up off the ground.

You watched as he and many others climbed up the steps to take their seat on the familiar transport. 'Back to hell...' you thought. Your existence was always a blur to you, or just routine- get up, skip breakfast, go to school, skip lunch, go home, skip dinner- in which you were always fasting.  However in the end you always went back to eating the disgusting substance of what most people call food.  You despised the word, the meaning, but most of all- the action. All you had to do was ignore it, just completely disregard its existence, then you could be pretty. Then and only then, you could be thin, skinny, fragile and delicate- something you always have yearned for.

The result of being this perfect would send you another step closer to him, and that thought alone was enough to motivate you to the end.  'This time...' your mind nervously echoed. 

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WOAH THIS PART PRACTICALLY WROTE ITSELF, LIKE BOI I AM SHOOK. ANYWAys i hope ya'll enjoyed this story as much as i did writing it, and if you cant tell i am v v new to the wattpad community... but i really did enjoy making this, so if you want more parts fast then feel free to tell me and ill get on that asap.  
thank you so much for reading/leaving cONstrUcTiVe criticism on this part, see ya! xoxo cora ;)