Captivated

Unaccepted Apologies

The moon casted a shadow across the wall as I opened my eyes. I had fallen asleep against the bathroom door. The back of my neck hurt and my head was killing me from my hangover. I stood from the door trying to remember why I had fallen asleep here in the first place. I looked around the room for Elizabeth, but she was nowhere in sight. I gently opened the bathroom door and looked for her. I found her sleeping in the bathtub, tears stained her face and I suddenly remembered what had happened.

I cursed at myself. How could I try and hurt her? I sat on the edge of the bathtub and watched her sleep. I cannot hurt her again. I'm sure she'll never want to see me again so I guess staying away from her won't be a problem. The idea of not seeing her made my stomach drop. I shook the feeling away. Ray wasn't the man to let a woman get to him.

I gently lifted her from the bathtub and carried her to my bed. She stirred in her sleep as I lifted the blankets to her shoulders. She snuggled into the blanket and continued her soft snores. I sighed before making my way to one of our guest rooms. I tried taking advantage of her so sleeping beside her probably isn't the best idea.

I walked down the silent hallway making my way to the guest room. The door creaked and dust flew around the room. The guest room was never used so the room wasn't the cleanest. I climbed into the foreign sheets feeling awful for the condition I left Elizabeth in. I tossed and turned trying to get her crying violet eyes and her amazing soft lips out of my mind. I huffed because my conscious got the better of me.

I walked back to my bedroom willing to throw myself at her feet and apologize. I opened the door and made my way to the bed. I removed the bedsheets only to find the bed empty. Shit. I ran to the bathroom searching for her. Nothing. I searched downstairs in the kitchen. She wasn't there. After searching through the whole house I grabbed my car keys and made my way to the snow.

I drove around for half an hour before seeing a figure trudging through the snow. I slowed down the car to find Elizabeth walking in the snow. I pulled the car over to the side of the road and ran out to her. She was wearing my shirt, a pair of my sweatpants, and a sweatshirt. She was shivering and soaking wet. I pulled her against me resisting her urge to hit me.

"Let me go now!" She screamed and kicked against me, but I sat her in the car and buckled her up. I walked away from her side of the car but she climbed out. I sighed and settled her back in. "I am not getting in this car with a rapist! Now let me go!"

"If you stay outside any longer you'll freeze to death. Now stop fighting me and let me help you." I raised my voice so she'd listen. She sat back quietly and I put the child lock on just incase. I traveled around the car in the freezing cold. As I sat back inside the car Elizabeth sat shivering staring out the window.

"I want you to take me home." She pouted out the window. I felt terrible for what I did to her, but that gave her no reason to try and kill herself.

"I'll take you home tomorrow, it's four in the morning and I'm exhausted." I drove back towards my house. She still shivered in her seat.

"Are you still cold?" She rolled her eyes at me. I took off the jacket I was wearing and handed it to her. She stared at it for a minute before taking it and wrapping it around herself.

"Elizabeth, I'm sorry. I was drunk and that isn't an excuse." I looked toward her but she wouldn't meet my gaze.

"Why would you do that to me?" Tears ran down her face. I mentally slapped myself. I am such a jackass.

"I didn't mean to, I was just drunk and got carried away. It will never happen again, please just forgive me." She remained quiet the rest of the ride.

I pulled into the garage of the house. I sat in the car for a minute, trying to decide the best way to fix this problem. Elizabeth remained silent and kept staring out the window. I sighed in defeat as I left my side of the car and let Elizabeth out. She huffed but remained in the car.

"Why are you acting like this? Even the garage is cold, please come inside." She rolled her eyes but climbed out of the car. I walked into the house expecting her to follow me. She stood in the doorway. I groaned and walked over to her. She was still shaking, but she was being so stubborn.

"Dove please come get into the shower and warm up or something." I grabbed her hand but she pulled away.

"Do not call me that." She walked up the stairs and disappeared in the guest bathroom. I followed her and knocked on the door.

"What do you want now?" She yelled through the door.

"The hot water doesn't work in there. Just come to my bathroom. I promise I'll leave you alone." I walked back into the bedroom. A few seconds later she followed behind and went into my bathroom. The hum of running water filled the quiet room. I paced the room running my fingers through my hair. She hated me. She risked her damn life to get away from me. How was I so stupid? The faint sound of sobbing broke my heart. I couldn't let her suffer like this anymore.

I lightly knocked on the door. "Go away!" She screamed between sobs. I punched the bedroom wall. How could I let her know how sorry I was?

"Elizabeth, please stop crying." I rested my head against the bathroom door.

"Please just leave me alone." Her voice sounded so broken. I swore to myself I would never force a girl into anything. The guilt was eating me alive. I tried to see if the door would budge. Thankfully it did, she forgot to lock the door.

I walked into the bathroom quietly, grabbing a towel from the shelf and handing it her through the curtain. "Put the towel around you because I'm putting you to bed." I heard noises from the bathtub and slowly lifted the curtain. Elizabeth was sitting on the bathtub floor cradling her head in her hands. I reached down and lifted her into my arms. She didn't resist, instead she buried her head in my neck and sobbed. I carried her to the bed and sat down with her on my lap. I rocked her back and forth while she cried.

"I'm so sorry." Was all I could whisper as I held her against me.

She pulled back wiping her eyes. "Can I have some clothes?" I nodded towards her, setting her off my lap and grabbing her a shirt and sweatpants. I handed them to her and went to the kitchen to grab some water so she could change. I brought the water back to her. She drank it slowly before climbing into my bed. I laid beside her afraid to move in case I would upset her. She turned her back towards me and soon enough there were muffled snores coming from her mouth. I turned the other way, losing myself in thoughts before falling asleep.