He looked at me, eyes full of sadness and grief. I had to look away, to not succumb to his wishes. How could I possibly accomplish what he wanted? I've been living like this for as long as I know. I couldn't.. I couldn't leave my best friend.
"Perfe...
"You can never do it. You're weak. You're not committed enough. Are you sure you even want this? You are fucking eating peanut butter. That's just taking disgusting to a whole new level. Uggh, you're such an embarrassment. I mean, how can you not see it? Look at your sister. Rose is just, perfect. If you wanted me to list her perfection, then I'd waste both of our time. But hey, don't worry. It's not like you have anything better to do. You're just.. a waste of space.
***********
I woke up with my alarm clock blaring on my bedside table. With a groaned, I switch it off. I pulled the blanket off of me and made my way towards the bathroom. My chest-length brown hair was fairly easy to brush, and I did just that before stripping. I piled the dirty clothes in the basket and stepped into shower and bask into the warm water cascading my body.
"You should've woke up earlier to exercise. Do I have to remind you every day, Fiona?"
"Leave me alone."
The beautiful girl with blonde hair just smiled at me. There's nothing warm about that smile at all. "You'll never rid of me, sweetheart. You did signed the contract."
I sighed and she's gone. Waking up every day to a perfect girl reminding me of my imperfection is not a good way to start my day. Rinsing my body from the soap, I stepped out of the shower and dry myself. I put on my robe and twist the towel on my hair to dry it.
While waiting for it to dry, I scrolled on my to-do list and realized I had to do some grocery shopping today. I stared for awhile longer until I heard her voice again.
"Hmm, grocery shopping. My favorite part of the day! Though, why do you need to go grocery shopping anyway, Fiona? You live alone, like the loser you are, and you're not allowed to eat. You're just wasting your time sweetie," she said while looking at me while leaning against the bathroom door.
"I know, Ana. You forgot that I have to keep appearances if I don't want anyone to suspect anything," I said lowly. She just chuckled and disappear. I untwist the towel from my head and proceed with curling my hair and putting on some make up to make me look.. human. Just some eyeliner and mascara with lip gloss and I'm good. Then, I went straight to the closet and chose the outfit for today.
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Fixing everything in front mirror for the last time, I just stared into my eyes until I saw a blonde figure looking at me with the look of utter disgust. I can feel my eyes became teary and tried to control my breathing. Ana was gone, but she never took the feelings with her. The feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness.
"No matter how good you are in make up, you'll never be able to hide that ugly face of yours. The empty eyes where it used to shine and the bags forming from your lack of sleep will always be there. That clothes of yours? Hideous. Disgusting. Just like the wearer. Wearing something that shows your fat stomach is such a moronic thing to do, Fiona. And those legs? It's nowhere near our goals. Remember this, Fiona; we strive for perfection. Everything we do, we do it because we have control over our mind, body and soul. Show them, that you are in control."
