•hiatus• Looking at These Walls [Kygan Blake]

Looking at These Walls ~Kygan Blake~ With @FilipnoKid

~Author's POV~

 He lie there, in a puddle of his own blood. Red liquid oozing from his wrists. The razor blades just beside his head. Face to the floor, not even bothering to try cleaning himself up. Knowing Kyle wouldn't come back after what happened the last time they saw each other. The name "KYLE" carved into his dainty, skinny wrists. The last words from his mouth, before darkness casts over his body... " I will always love you, Kyle.". 

(Kyle's POV)

I hissed every time the cold metal hit my wrists. "K'. Hiss. "E'. Hiss. "A". Hiss. "G". Hiss. "A". Hiss. "N". Hiss. Blood pouring from my cut wrists. Like I even care? Not since Keagan and I left  each other.  It hurt to much. Him, the one and only thing on my mind whilst I did this. I wonder if he found somebody else already. He is quite the handsome lad, if you ask me... I miss him terribly. "It - it - it just hurts so much", I mumbled to myself as I dug the razor blade into my arm, finishing off his name. The last thing I remember, a voice screaming my name in pain. Like it physically hurt them to see me in this state...

(Keagan's POV)

I don't know how long ago I made these scars on my wrists, but however long ago they were, they haven't faded yet. I spend every night I can in my bathroom, razor in hand, on the floor, carving. Carving. Carving. Two things are what my hands automatically make out. "Kyle" and "Love". I've got them everywhere, the scars. My wrists, arms, chest, stomach. Everywhere I can reach. My back has several lines down it, not being able to write the words, that's what it turns out to be. My natural blue eyes, no color in them anymore. Just grey. Dark, cold, and bottomless. I don't leave my flat. I don't eat. Honestly, I'm starving myself, but then again, does anyone really care about me anymore? I don't even turn on the television anymore. I just lie in bed, hoping one day Kyle will love me again. Love me like he used to. I wonder if he found someone new to love him, who doesn't have uncontrollable anger issues. Who doesn't lash out accidentally, ( but every time after, I swear I apologized to him) and end up hurting him in some way.  I still remember our falling out just as if it were yesterday...

*FLASHBACK to that day*

I was waiting for the perfect moment to tell Kyle. I had it kept a secret and I knew I couldn't comtain it any more. I'd probably exploded if I tried another day longer... I waited until we were both comfortable on our own sides of the King sized bed we shared, just until we was about to doze off to try to tell him. I knew that with perfect timing, it'd both shock and excite Kyle. He was just that type of person, and I knew it. "Kyle, I -" I was cut off by the sound of his small snores. I just decided to shake him a bit, in hopes to wake him. It worked, thankfully, so I just started over with what I was planning on saying. "Kyle, I know we've been together for a while now, and -", again, I was cut off by his small snores escaping his parted lips. I did, if I'm being honest with you here, start to get frustrated with him. It's like he's always asleep. "KYLE, BABE! WAKE UP! IT'S IMPORTANT!", I tried to calmly say to him... "Mhhhmuhhum", a simply mumble, that was all I got out of him. He fluttered his beautiful green eyes open, and I almost stopped the anger rushing away from me. i pulled his groggy body up and leaned him against the wooden headboard of the bed. "Kyle, you keep falling -" , I was cut off by a small sound coming from Kyle. "KYLE!", I shouted loudly. "HMMMM?", he asked, still to drowsy to form a coherent word or phrase to me. "KYLE! YOU KEEP FREAKING FALLING ASLEEP WHEN I'M TRYING TO TALK TO YOU!", I shouted at him, no longer able to contain my anger pouring out of me at the moment. "Keagan.. I- I - I.. I'm so-", he tried to get out before..... *SMACK*          My palm collided with his cheek. I felt a stinging in my hand, but I didn't even bother to think of it. My main priority was helping Kyle, I just hit him. Oh my gosh. I just hit my boyfriend..."Kyle...", I looked down during this time. "I'm so-", was all I could get out before I ran out of the room and into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. "What did I just do?", I thought to myself. I just hit the love of my life. I hit him. I hit him. I hit him. That was the only thought my mind would register. I. HIT. HIM. I'm the abusive boyfriend. I. AM.       I slid down the closesd bathroom door, sobbing to myself. Screaming at the mistake I had just done. Not even caring if Kyle, for some reason, was still in our flat. "YOU MONSTER! LOOK WHAT YOU DID! THAT'S YOUR FAULT! YOU. HURT. HIM... IT WAS ALL... YOU.", I yelled at myself. I stood up and stumbled over to the medicine cabneit above our sink. I grabbed a razorblade, sat back down, and debated on wether or not to take this plunge... I chose... Yes. Then, I started to carve the only thing that came to my mind at that moment... "Kyle" and "Love"....

*Flashback Over*