Make Believe

Past and Present

Past

Bang. Bang. Bang

That was it. Two shots. Three shots. Four shots. He was gone. He dropped dead, and in less than a heartbeat, I was out of that house. Never to be seen in Atlanta, Georgia ever again.

Present

Now living in Los Angeles, California, my life has changed a lot. You may be confused right now. Like “Who the hell are you? Who did you kill? Why?” Ha. Nosy ass. Here let me explain myself.

When I was 13 my mother, my own mother, put me in a gang. I never wanted to be in it. She fooled me. She told me it was going to be fun, everything was going to be okay. She said if I didn’t do it she would take me out of school and tell the cops to put me in jail. When I was 13, school was my main priority. Then my life changed. I was only 13 back then. I didn’t know any better. I was fooled.

 She told me its been in the family generations for years, which was true.

When she was 13 she lived in Ohio. She killed and ran away. Then she had me. I killed and ran away. It really is a cycle.

It was a town gang. Every 13 year old girl in town would have to be in it if your mother was in a gang in a previous state. Once you shoot you have to run away for good. Then the gang would find you again in the next state and you would continue your mission. I ran to the next state, but then I went to the next state, and the next, and the next. I didn’t care. I never wanted to be with those selfish killers ever again.

I landed in California. I got a ride from some people. They classified me as a hitchhiker. They gave me $30 and dropped me off at some corner store. I bought a little snack and roamed the streets while they left. I was grateful at the time. Every week that same couple would come back and give me 30 dollars and I would go into the store, buy something, and come out.

 For the next two years, I started to save up their money. I was up to about 13,000 dollars. After a month, the couple never came back. I was now 15. My clothes were getting ripped and did not fit me anymore. I haven’t said a word in 2 years. It was time to.

I walked 3 blocks and came to an Apartment Complex. “Hello. How may I help you?” Said a lady at a desk. “Um I-I would like to buy an apartment here.” My voice was raspy, but I managed. “How old are you?” She said having a questioned look on her face. I thought. I’m 15. She would never let me in. “I’m um I’m 15.” “Sorry Madame.  You have to be atleast 18 to get an apartment here.” She looked me in the eyes and then looked me up and down. I felt stupid for even coming in here.

“But just between you and me, I think I can get you one here.” What an angel I said to myself. She stood up leaving her desk and taking my hand. “Follow me.”

She took me to the fifth floor. Room 2b. “This is where you’ll be staying.” There was 2 beds. Both were empty. There was a TV on the other side of the room and small kitchen and a bathroom. I was amazed. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d seen a bed. “How much?” was my only question. She looked me up and down again. “For you, I’d say just pay 350 every month.” A little bit too excited I said “Thank you so much!” and gave her a hug. I’d never been so happy.

“May I ask, what is your name?” She said smiling. I thought for a minute. My name is Crystal Smith. I looked around the room. My name is Crystal Smith. I thought of my past. My name is Crystal Smith. I looked at her smile fade once I didn’t respond. It finally came out, but in a different way then I wanted it to. “My name is Destiny. Destiny Dior.”