Batter(OFF) X Shrek

Batter X Shrek

It was a hot day.
Unfortunately, Batter was lost in a forest. Outside. How did he get lost? Well, that's another story. "Why did I decide to wear my long-sleeved shirt TODAY?" he asked himself. "Why couldn't I have gone shirtless?" He walked forward sluggishly staring at the ground trying to find an exit to the seemingly endless forest.

Suddenly, a large shadow formed next to his own. "What could that be?" Batter thought. He turned around only to find that the sun was in his eyes. He squinted. The shadow belonged to a large, green person. But maybe it wasn't a person at all...

"You lost, kid?" It said. Batter replied,"Y-yes. Can you help find my way out of this forest, uhh-"

"Shrek", it said.

"Oh, thank you. But can I call you Senpai-chan instead?"

"Sure."

"My name is Batter-san. Nice to meet you Senpai-chan. Sorry if this offends you but are you ok? I mean why are you GREEN?"

"Oh. That's natural, I'm an ogre! And it hasn't offended me, Batter-san. Let's just get you out of this forest."

They walked until sunset. The sky was beginning to darken. "Oops, looks like we have to stop," Shrek said."It's dangerous at night. There's a lot of creatures." "Ok." Batter uttered.

They chose a comfortable cave to rest in. Shrek took a sleeping bag out of his backpack that you didn't know he was carrying. He also took out a box of matches, a bag of marshmallows, and a canteen of water.

Shrek left for a while and came back with a pile of sticks. Batter used the matches to set the sticks on fire after setting aside a few. They used the extra sticks to roast marshmallows.

Batter fell asleep for a few seconds but immediately woke up after his marshmallow caught on fire. "S-senpai-chan!1!!!11"Batter yelled. "Calm down, Batter-san!"Shrek yelled back. Shrek took the marshmallow and threw it on the ground. The fire went out. Batter started crying loudly.

"Seeeennnpppppaaiiiiii that was the last marshmallloooooooowwww cri wAHHHHHHH HOW COULD YOU??? I WANTED TO EAT THAT AND NOW ITS DIRTyIIIII!!!!!!?!!!"

"Calm down Batter-san. Have mine instead,"Shrek calmly responded."Sorry but I already ate some of it." Batter stopped wailing and took the marshmallow. Half of it was eaten by Shrek.

"Thank you, Senpai-chan," Batter said while sniffling.

He took the marshmallow and ate it. But didn't Shrek eat it first? So it was kind of like a kiss? Batter started blushing like crazy after realizing this. Shrek noticed. "Whoa Batter-san, are you alright? You look like you have a fever." Shrek took his hand and felt Batter's forehead, which only caused Batter to blush more.

"Batter-san, you should probably get some rest. You might be sick." Shrek stated.

"N-no watashi wa fine d-d-desu."

"BattER. YOU ARE NOT FINE. GET SOME REST."

"Watashi doesn't need to rest."

"Why do you keep saying 'watashi'"?

"Uh, no reason. J-just leave me alone please..."

"We are in a TINY CAVE. I can't leave you alone because it is not possible."

"Fine. I'll go to sleep." Batter took the sleeping bag and crawled in. "S-Senpai-chan? Aren't you going to rest too?"

"No, I have to make sure we are safe."

"Come on, you have worked a lot today. You should get some sleep."

"I guess I could." Shrek put out the fire and laid down on the cold cave floor. Batter questioned,"Aren't you going to be cold?" Shrek replied sadly,"Nope, I'm used to this kind of stuff."

"Why don't you use this sleeping bag?"

"Then you are going to be cold."

Batter blushed."W-well I mean like why don't we sh-sh-share the sleeping bag?"

Shrek turned red before saying,"I-if you don't mind Batter-san..."

"N-no"

"Ok" He climbed into the sleeping bag too. Neither of them could get any rest because they were too embarrassed to even fall asleep.

When morning came, they were both glad because it was soooooo awkward. But nothing happened that night ok stop thinking about that. I can see you. Stop thiNKING. Ok.

Shrek packed up the sleeping bag, matches, and canteen (with his yaoi hands, in case you were wondering). Batter walked outside the cave. Surprisingly, there was an exit to the forest that he couldn't see last night because it was dark.

"Hey, there was an exit right here! Did you know know about this, Senpai-chan?"

"N-no! I mean...yes i did...please don't be mad."

"But WHY? I could have left yesterday instead of today!"

"I just didn't want you to go."Shrek started to tear. "Please don't leave. Batter, I-I-I love you."

"I would have never even thought of leaving if you had told me that sooner. I love you too, Shrek-Senpai. And I always will. I know we have only met 1/2 a day ago, but I love you."

"I have loved you ever since I first saw you. (That was 5 years ago Shrek was stalking him don't worry he was never caught)."

"Let's get married."

"Good idea."