A Cure For the Lonely Heart

Part 4: Bits & Pieces

                        Lemme begin to explain how I'm not always the most well behaved kid back in Preschool. Let's see.. Back at that particular age, that was my first time play fighting with any of the boys about the same age as I was. Boys whom I could relate to in the shows that we watch - our common interests and so on. Of course. A few would be deemed to be inappropriate preschool behaviour. To be honest, Play fighting was something that became real fighting most of the times at that age I was in - even more so than when I was back in elementary school. I guess as I age, I've matured overtime without really noticing just by how much I've actually grown throughout the times in my life. I get in plenty of troubles because of the little skirmish fighting we do as a result. Especially when I take the fighting a bit too much to the extreme out of control. That's when the parents are notified of all this done behind their backs, which always gets me in much more deeper shit than usual because IF my mom knew what I've done, she would legitimately spank me a 100 times before my punishment was all over. Injured a kid or not, that kind of behaviour is not tolerated back home or anywhere else in my mom's book. Yup.  That's her. To sum it all up, She'd get super duper pissed if she knew anything about me getting much hands on. Most people during this age may call it "physical abuse" but this is how punishments were handed out back home in Taiwan. It's quite normal for us how things were done around here.

                        There are about a few more things I would like to talk about for a little bit. Not sure if I'd miss anything on the main highlights of my preschool life but it's gonna be about the throwing up business, a loyal friend of mine , a show I remember we watch most frequently and ...oh never mind! Let's just get on with it.

                        Firstly, I'd like to get the gross/disgusting whatever you wanna call it stuff out of the way. Hopefully you aren't eating while reading all of what I'm about to say right now. As that would very much ruin your appetite and obviously something none of us would want. Especially you right? Anyways.. so yes. This is quite a tiny detail from way back but I used to have a very weak stomach where I just puke out much of the food I've ever eaten. Yet I don't even eat much and was extraordinarily thin at the time this took place as.. a five year old I suppose. Everything about me at that particular age probably screams out fragile at that time. Not something I could've helped nor did the excellent metabolism I had and still have up to now. A miracle right? Haha. Well that's that. It was such a mess whenever I do barf & empty out whatever were to be the contents in my tummy. Even my teachers had a hard time dealing with this 'every- so often- fiasco' that occasionally - my mom had to be brought in to take me home when I'm REALLY not feeling well & yes yes. It meant I took the day off whenever my stomach became too sick to do any activities throughout the day at school and such.

                        I'm not exactly sure why but this was something about a year back when I was five years old. Sooo basically I'm talking about something that happened while I was four years old. So, for some reason, during the day cares I go to, I just never ask to go to the bathroom. Nor do anyone ask me if I did go to the washroom or whatever ya know what I mean? This was some time ago before I started Preschool. Whether I was too shy to go or I was thinking what would happen if I held it in far longer than I would have normally done - that is beyond me as I said. I can't really remember that far back on my actual thoughts on this particular matter. But the same thing happens at home during those times. I kept holding it in and of course. It felt like my bladder was about to burst from all the fluid being kept in there. I'm not really positive how long I did something like this by the way. But for sure I did it for over a day - posing quite the problem which I will get to later. Thing is, both of my parents had asked me many times whether or not I need to go to the bathroom at that time this event took place as well as other times during my childhood - and of course I lied to them every night as they asked if I went to piss. It was dumb of me really. To keep something like this from all the adults I knew and stubbornly refused to take a washroom break. 'Course, I never mentioned it in front of the kids at day care either. Thinking back all that happened makes me review those thoughts. Like why did I do this or that? or "oh.My. God. I am so stupid. What was I thinking back then?" Knowing that the 'me' now would never do anything I thought was an idiotic move from what I've done in the past.

                        All I know is that, one day, It made me unable to piss when I wanted to. Given the period of time I've held it in (Most likely a few days for all I know) and this is the part where I'm not too sure whether or not I told my parents or I told one of the adults at daycare about. As far as I know, I was found out and most likely went to check - up immediately afterwards..