A Driver's Test

Driver's Test

"Why do the pictures always look bad?" I asked my dad as we walked out of the DMV with my new license in hand.  My dad then had the audacity to laugh at me. "Really Dad, really? I look awful, don't laugh at me." My long blonde wavy hair looked like a bird's nest making it seem like I just rolled out of bed. I mean I did, but I really wish I didn't look like I did.

"I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at your picture," my dad said as he hopped into the passenger seat of the beat up, old red truck, tossing the keys at me. "You get to drive."

See, I am not the best driver. I barely passed my drivers test when I swerved around a mailbox that came out of nowhere. Somehow I passed and now I have to drive us home.

Okay, I got this, we'll be fine. I buckled my seat belt, put the keys in the ignition, put my foot on the break, put my hands on the wheel at ten and two, moved the gearshift to drive, slowly lifted my foot off the break and stepped on the gas. When I finally got out of the giant orange cone covered DMV parking lot, I felt free. The orange, red, and yellow falling leaves surrounded me as I drove through the countryside on the way home. For it being mid-November, I was wearing black running shorts, even though I never run, with my favorite hoodie. I looked around and saw no cars on the hilly road and decided to press down on the gas pedal a little harder.

"Hadley, slow down," my dad screeched as he squeezed the arm rest.

"Nobody likes a backseat driver. We're fine. I know what I'm doing, I mean, I passed the test didn't I?" The smirk prominent on my face as I ran through a stop sign. There were still no cars surrounding us and I wanted to get home before my mom. I picked up my phone and turned on some music.

"Hadley! You're going to kill us. You just ran a stop sign and you're driving too fast. Slow down and keep your eyes on the road."

"Chill Dad. We're fine"

"No, we're not fine because you're not paying attention at all!"

"Well maybe if you would just be quiet, I could focus! And while you're at it, maybe you could trust me! Just back off." I was on the breaking point and I didn't want to talk anymore. I turned my music up louder and drowned out whatever my dad was trying to say.

My phone was buzzing nonstop so I picked it up, keeping one hand on the wheel, only to see thousands of texts about where I was. I told my friends that I couldn't go to the movies later because my dad was being totally unfair. Before we left for the DMV, he said I couldn't go because he doesn't trust my friends. Doesn't he trust me? He is always trying to control me when I am sixteen. He doesn't need to baby me anymore.

"Hadley!" My dad yelled at the top of his lungs as I looked up and saw the red light above me and a car coming at us on the right. Everything was a blur. There was an earsplitting bang as the other car slammed into the passenger seat where my dad was. I slammed my head into the wheel and when I pulled back, I touched my head only to feel something wet. I looked down at my fingers and saw the unforgettable red color of my own blood. I looked over at my dad to see him unconscious and covered in blood and shrapnel from the crash.

I blindly searched for my phone until I felt the familiar shape of my case. I quickly typed in 911 and waited for someone to pick up. After giving them my information, they asked about my dad. I looked at him again and lost it. The tears ran down my face as I saw the condition he was in. It was even worse than before, and when I felt for a pulse, it was very faint.

The bright flashing lights blinded me as they came closer. The sirens pierced my ears as I opened my door and stepped out. Paramedics rushed around me in a flurry. I saw my dad get put on the stretcher and I rushed to his side to follow. He was loaded into the ambulance and I hopped in after him.

"What is your father's name? Does he have any medical conditions or allergies?" one of the paramedics asked as the others hooked my dad up to all the machines and immediately started to check his vitals.

"His name is Derek Johnson. He's not allergic to anything but I don't know a lot about his medical history" I tripped over my words forcing them to come out. This can't be real. Suddenly, a loud, ominous, monotone sound reverberated throughout the ambulance, signaling that his heart had stopped.

I was shoved out of the way as a paramedic got out the defibrillator. After three tries, rhythmic beats filled the ambulance once again. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding in. Come on Dad, don't leave me. The sight of the blood everywhere finally caught up to me as I felt the world slipping through my fingers...

This all has to be a dream, right? This couldn't have actually happened and now I'm just waking up from a nightmare, right? Tell me I'm right. Yet, when I opened my eyes, I saw a worried face standing over me, machines surrounding me in an old and dingy ambulance, and my dad is still on the stretcher bleeding out.

"Are you alright miss?" the paramedic asked me with the same face my dad wore when I was a kid and broke my arm.

"I think I'm gonna be sick" I whispered as I turned to the side and emptied my lunch from my stomach into a conveniently placed bucket. The paramedic held my hair back, and after it seemed like there was nothing left, I looked up and saw my dad again. I moved closer to him and held his hand the rest of the way to the hospital, hoping that my stupidity can be forgiven.

Everything happened so fast when we got to the hospital. My dad and I were separated as I went to a treatment room and he went to a trauma unit. I heard someone yell he needed to go into surgery immediately. A nurse approached me to check on my head and asked me about my family. I quickly grabbed my phone and called my mom. When I finally got the words out of my mouth, an unnerving cry at the other end of the phone escaped my mother's mouth, causing me to soon follow her lead.

The hospital was eerily silent and the smell was like, well a hospital. I've always hated having to go the doctor. Whenever I had to go to the doctor's office for a shot, I would kick and scream and bite the doctor so I wouldn't get it. I tried to think of anything to distract myself in hope that I would forget what was happening, but I was brought back to reality when my mom arrived only ten minutes later with my little brother behind her. I ran into her welcoming arms when she entered the room as they were the only thing that kept me from falling. Then there's Ollie. If our dad is not okay, Ollie will grow up not knowing our dad, not having the memories I have.

"Mrs. Johnson?" A doctor called out searching for us. We stood up and she made her way toward us. "I'm Dr. Cook and I am the lead surgeon operating on your husband. He is still in surgery and we are doing everything we can to help him. From what we can see now, he suffered from a cracked rib that punctured his lung, several broken bones, a ruptured spleen, and a severe concussion. He lost a lot of blood and there have been some rough patches so far. We lost him twice but he is stable now as my team is continuing to work on him. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask." She walked back through the restricted doors with the look still on her face. The look that says he doesn't have a chance, and the last thing I said to him, we were in a fight and I was yelling at him. He told me to be careful and I wasn't. I'll never be able to forgive myself.

We waited for hours, my mom trying to be strong, Ollie oblivious to everything, and me just staring at the blank white walls. Dr. Cook finally came through the doors and walked towards us with a look on her face that is never good. She spoke with remorse as she relayed what I've been dreading, "I'm sorry but there was nothing we could do..."

I couldn't feel anything. Not the blood, not the tears, not the headache, not the heartache, nothing. I'm completely numb. This is all my fault.