With a Little Help from my Friends

1 | Losing It

Mondo Oowada was going insane.

Some people might have said that he was already insane based on his reputation and his lifestyle, but they didn't know what went on inside his head. There was a method to his brand of madness. There was an order, a way things were supposed to be done.

The absolute agony of being in love with his best friend was not part of the plan, and the more he thought about it the more he felt like throwing himself out the nearest window or taking a very long, very cold shower for the rest of eternity.

At first he had tried to deny it. He had tried to dismiss the fluttering in his chest and the flip-flopping in his stomach and the blood that was constantly rushing to his face as symptoms of his intense friendship with his kyoudai. He made excuses for his constant urge to hug him and put his arm around him, and he rationalized away his daydreams about what it would be like to kiss him—

Actually, that was where everything had ground to a halt, where he had been left with no choice but to accept that his feelings had evolved past what one could really call platonic.

Strangely, he felt no mourning for his lost friendship. This was because he hadn't lost it. Kiyotaka Ishimaru was still his best friend, the best anyone could ask for. It was just that he was more than that now, and Mondo feared that if he told the truth— if he admitted that things had gotten so bad he'd started imagining their future domestic life together and had already decided what kind of dog-child they would adopt and what they would name it— he would drive Kiyotaka away. There was no doubt in his mind that the prefect was... inexperienced when it came to love.

For several weeks after Mondo's realization, things continued as normal. He and his kyoudai still spent most of their days together, oftentimes in comfortable silence as they did their respective tasks, and oftentimes laughing and talking about whatever came to mind. Mondo had even learned to appreciate Kiyotaka's regular scoldings, as he had realized it was only ever done out of concern for his well-being. Mondo thought to himself that maybe things could stay this way, that he could swallow down his feelings and nothing had to change and that eventually his heart would learn to beat normally again.

This was wishful thinking.

Mondo began to notice more and more of Kiyotaka's adorable quirks (when had they become adorable instead of annoying?), and every time he looked too long at his ruby eyes or his pursed lips or his slender hands, he felt the urge to make Kiyotaka his rise once more. He started making excuses for leaving their outings early, started dodging him in the halls and avoiding his gaze in class.

Kiyotaka was dense when it came to these sorts of things, but even he was beginning to notice, and finally he asked the question that shot through Mondo's heart like a bullet. They were walking to their next class, and Kiyotaka had caught up to Mondo without him noticing.

"Kyoudai, do you not wish to be my friend anymore? You have been avoiding me. What have I done that has upset you?"

Bang. Right through the heart. Mondo had half a mind to check himself into the infirmary, but instead he turned bright red, and his voice rose in volume as it always did when he was nervous.

"No, no, that's not it at all! Ya got the wrong idea, Taka, I swear to god! 'S just..."

What was it, exactly? What was he supposed to say? The biker risked a brief glance at Kiyotaka, who was looking up at him with those expectant red eyes, and he stomped his foot in frustration.

"Fuck!"

And just like that, Mondo took off running down the hallway like a coward, his hypothetical tail tucked between his legs. He could feel Kiyotaka's eyes burning holes in his back.

It became clear right then and there that something had to be done. He couldn't keep going on like this, and no matter what course of action he took it was possible that his kyoudai would get hurt. It was better, then, to be honest, right? That's what Daiya would say, right?

That was what had led up to this: the pivotal moment.

Mondo glanced at the clock and saw that the class period was nearing its end. This was a good window of time. It would mean that he wouldn't have to spend thirty minutes awkwardly awaiting a response, but that there would be time for a response.

He had seated himself near the front that day and made sure his desk was positioned right next to Kiyotaka's. The prefect had been delighted to see him, of course, after his little running-in-the-halls stunt from earlier (a stunt for which he was then reprimanded). Mondo glanced at Kiyotaka and saw that his gaze was fixed on the chalkboard in front.

Mondo casually slid a folded piece of paper onto Kiyotaka's desk and withdrew his hand entirely before the other boy even had a chance to react.

The method he'd chosen was perhaps the cheesiest and least confrontational in the world, but it was the best he could manage without a personal pep rally. He'd gone way old school. The note simply read Will you go out with me? followed by a small heart. Underneath were two checkboxes, one for yes and one for no.

To his immediate surprise, Kiyotaka glared at him, and then promptly crumpled the note and threw it back at Mondo. Mondo felt like his heart had been crumpled, somehow.

"The hell was that for?!" He hissed under his breath.

"Passing notes in class is against the rules," Kiyotaka responded. He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world, as oblivious as always.

Mondo slammed his head against his desk, folding his pompadour in the process. He did not notice Kyouko Kirigiri's icy stare.