The Girl on the Edge

"We were just heading to the coffee shop around the corner. We were both exhausted and needed some source of energy. We got to the corner across the street from the shop. I turned around to press the crosswalk button, I was only turned around for five seconds but that's all it took.... I heard a horrible sound coming from behind me... the sound of rubber skidding over concrete. I whipped my head around right after hearing the deafening sound of a blaring horn as the car collided with something in the road. I grabbed for her but she was no longer there. I searched quickly over the crowd before my eyes rested on the small limp figure lying in the road. I ran to her and dropped to my knees quickly gathering her in my arms. Around me there was chaos, I could tell there was... but I couldn't hear it. Everything was happening in slow motion but I could only focus on her. The crowd was beginning to surround us like buzzards. Her lifeless body lay in my arms slowly growing cold. I just couldn't take it. I couldn't take seeing her like this. I sat on the ground rocking her as I repeated the same words over and over, everything will be ok... Everything would be ok. Even I knew those words were lies. She was probably already gone, but I couldn't accept it. I buried my face into the crook of her neck and let the tear my eyes had been holding in slip down my cheeks. My chest was getting tighter and tighter, making it harder to breathe. I heard the approaching sound of sirens as I slowly slipped in the the darkness that had started to surround me. The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital."

"What happened then?" I glanced over at my therapists who sat on a overly cushioned armchair across from me. he peered at me over his thin wire glasses and nodded his head encouraging me to go on.

"The doctor at the hospital told me that they had pronounced her dead at the scene, they were worried that I had some 'deeper reason' behind my blackout so they kept me overnight for observation."

"And that's all you remember about your last day with Valerie."

"...Yes"

"You hesitated why?" he pushed on. I hated when he did that. I glanced at the clock and realized it was just barely six o'clock.

"It's time to end today's session right?"

"Oh, gosh, your right! I'll be seeing you next week then." I always knew no matter what the topic of our discussion was he'd drop it quickly if we had run over our time.

"Yeah, I guess" I mumbled as I quickly retreated from the room.

"Don't go getting yourself into trouble Ethan!"

I opened the door and winced slightly at the change in lighting. The bright fluorescent lights in the waiting room were way to bright. I walked over and sat down in one of the dirty looking Maroon chairs to wait for my ride.

The speakers about my head were releasing a very annoying excuse for music. I once asked the receptionists if they could change it somehow and she told me that it was supposed to be "relaxing." I know for a fact that's a load of shit. It's kind of hard to be relaxed and calm when you're talking about the tragedy that is your past.

Since visiting here I've learned that waiting before and after sessions can be extremely boring; so I decided I'd make a game to pass the time. Every time that I sat in the waiting room I would choose one person and try to figure out there story and what lead them to need therapy. One day a new girl walked in and she was the one I chose. I studied her for the longest and could come up with nothing. I soon discovered she was here every time I had a session. I looked up and scanned the waiting room and sure enough there she was sitting in the corner, her pale blue eyes focused on a painting on the wall that I hadn't noticed before. She had three constants about her: she always had her long jet black hair pulled back into a simple ponytail, she never wore anything other jeans and a T-shirt with the exception of a coat when it was cold, and she never spoke to anyone in the waiting room. If I didn't know any better I would've thought she was in the wrong building. There were no signs that would even hint to the reason this girl would ever need therapy. No scars, she doesn't look crazy, she doesn't even look depressed, but then again my mother always told me you can never judge a book by the cover. She doesn't look much like a person who struggles in life either, in fact she looked as if she had gotten more than needed as a child. Though I want to find out more about her, it's sort of impossible. I've thought about trying to start a conversation with her many times, but I once noticed anytime someone tried to have small talk with her she wouldn't acknowledge them. She would simply keep her eyes trained on one spot as if she didn't hear then at all. Maybe she's mute. That's stupid, why would she be in therapy where she has to talk constantly if she can't. I should really stop talking to myself, it makes me seem like a crazy person. I mean, I kind of am but I still shouldn't it might help a little.

My phone buzzed in my pocket notifying me that my ride was here and as I reached over to grab my jacket I stole one last glance at her. Her tanned skin had no makeup covering it and her piercing blue eyes sharply contrasted with her long dark hair. She's beautiful but that's another reason I can't talk to her, I'd get attached, just another person I can lose. I wish I could get to know her, but it's too big of a risk.