what.

Chapter 1

Honestly, I don't know where to start. I've been in the weirdest situations anyone can ever imagine. My life wasn't always easy. For example, in third grade, I ate a crayon. The next day, I vomited rainbows. Literally. Rainbows. Everywhere in my bathroom. 

I picked up a pencil and the grey part (you know, the granite) got really hot. Like, so hot, the paper I was writing on started to burn. That hot. But It had been so much weirder. I'm a pre-teen now, and ready to tell you my story. 

I was five and in second grade when it started, the weird stuff. I saw a face in my fireplace, my mom started crying diamonds when I wished we had more money, and my dad found a Cadillac and keys in the garage. I know. 

I should be the happiest person in the world. But what's living if you get everything you want the second you want it? Not cool. 

So, I spent my life trying to figure it out. Why me? What are these powers? Or maybe there's a genie with unlimited wishes following me. But I never wanted to vomit rainbows or have a burning pencil. 

So I went through my Dad's library, and what should I find but a giant book with a huge ruby on it on a table. I tried opening it, but it was locked. But where was the lock? Yeah, nowhere. This is why I hate books. They're so not helpful. 

I looked at the giant ruby, and held it in my palm. It fit perfectly. Like it was meant for me. I saw this in movies, but the technology was too advanced than what we have today. I twisted the ruby, and sure enough, the book cover popped open. 

God, it stunk. I frowned, and squinted, trying to adjust my eyes against the torn up page. The sides were burnt and I think it was written in Pig Latin. 

What even is Pig Latin? I don't know. Cool people say it. I am supremely cool. And supremely cool people had Ipods. I knew this was going to be a long book. I half-expected a word on each fifty pound page. 

But there was five-hundred (or more) pages of reading. I pressed play on 'shuffle', and listened to the song playing. 

"I've never seen a diamond in the flesh," I sang with Lorde. "I cut my teeth on wedding rings in the mo -" the song was cut off by some static noise. It never did that before. "- proud of my address." it continued. 

I pressed pause. I wasn't scared, but wierded out. I picked up the Ipod and paused. Okay. I wasn't going to listen to the song. My Ipod didn't like Lorde. I bit my lip, and flicked to the next page. 

In large, red ink, it said, 'READ OUT LOUD'. Seemed normal to me. I looked at the text under it, and read; "In hoc libro, qui legit suxisti..." Yep. Definitely Pig Latin. 'This is stupid,' I thought, shaking my head. 'I have cool powers. I just have to control it! Not read about it. Books suck.' 

I opened the door out of the Library, and stepped into my Living -

Yeah. No. What. I. Can't even. No. Why. My house. My internet. All gone.

I was standing in a meadow. Not even a meadow. A damn pretty meadow. I wanted to put a flower in my hair and prance around like a unicorn. What was wrong with me. And this place. It was affecting me. 

'Stop!' I thought, fists clenched. 'Or I will go all Russian on this meadow!' The feeling went away. So I could control this power. Ha. Take that, nature. 

A butterfly flew into my face. "Ow!" I gagged, waving it away from me. I sniffed after it flew away, and turned back to the library. I need to find a Pig Latin Translator to see what I said and ... "Crap." I said. The library was gone. 

I whipped around as soon as I heard trotting, and inched forward a little bit. "Hello?" I called. No answer. Must be a rogue horse. "Hey! Come out, you coward!" I yelled. 'Make it come out!' I thought desperately. The trotting started again, but this time I heard a voice. 

"Wha'? But, I'm not movin'! How am Ah movin'?" It was a deep southern accent. 

Like great Uncle Paul. Yeah. He lived in the Country Side. Pfft. No internet there. I watched as a white stallion glared right at me, trotting forward, followed by a struggling guy. Girl. What? She sounded so manly. Boyish.  

I watched as she tried digging her finger-nails into trees, trying to stop herself. "No point struggling." I grumbled, trying to be helpful. "My wish is my command." 

"Stop!" She gasped, trying to hold onto a branch. The horse was still walking to me. It was going to walk over me. 'Free them.' I thought. The 'girl' let go of the branch, and brushed leaves off her jeans. 

Then I actually looked at her. She was short about about thirteen years of age. She wore an aqua t-shirt with a mermaid on it and jeans, complete with black converse. She had short green hair and eyes, pale skin and green nail polish on her fingernails. She had a round face and was glaring at me angrily. 

"What?" I asked. 

"Ya jus' tortured me right then an' there, madam. Care to explain why?" she snapped. I get really angry now. 

"Care to explain why you were following me?" I yelled back. "Jerk." I walked past her, and the horse followed me. 

"Come on, Jack, we're goin' back home." The girl said. I kept storming away. "Jack," She repeated. I turned around, seeing the horse. 

"Freeze, horse." I said, seeing a golden opportunity. The horse went completely still. The girl was freaking out. 

"What did ya do to my horse?" She yelled, running up to me.  

"Where am I?" I answered, ignoring her question. 

Her eyes went diluted, frozen in place. "Silva Forest." She answered, as if in a trance. Well, she was. Let me have my moment. 

"Where's that?" I asked. 

"Saltus Lake, Saltus City, the Country of Gaudium, the Contitent of Grand Gaurios. Planet Eros." 

"Names are so original." I said. 

"I know right," She answered, still in a trance. Which I found kind of funny. Just saying. I snorted, and snapped my fingers, thinking 'free'. I snapped my fingers for the extra effect. Because in movies, it's cool. 

"What did ya do to me?" She gasped, holding her neck. "You were inside my 'ead!" 

"No I wasn't." I said quickly. I looked at her, and frowned. I realized the horse was at his master's side. I must have freed both of them. 

"My name is Catherine." I said, a hand on my hip as I examined my other hand. That was what movie bad girls did. "Call me Cat." 

"I'm Griffin." The girl - Griffin said. "Call me ... uh ... Griffin." She said uneasily. "This is my horse," She spread open her palm, putting it under the horse's chin. "Ramosa." 

"Pig Latin." I grumbled under my breath. 

"No," She answered. "Just Latin." 

"Pig Latin, Latin, same thing." 

"No." 

"Whatever." I sighed. "Anyway, I want you to take me back home." 

"Home?" 

"Home. Dublin. Ireland. Europe. Earth. The Solar System. Take me back." 

"Ireland?" She said, clearly confused. "I have a friend... Well, she's more of a.. queen... named Ireland. I can take you to her." 

"You're serious." I said, though it was meant to be a question. 

"Ireland knows everything. Maybe she can take you back." 

I thought about it for a second, and shrugged. "Eh, what the hell." I said, and put out my hands as if I was about to be handcuffed. "Take me to your leader."