Perks Of Being In A Gang

For Diamonds Do Appear To Be, Just Like Broken Glass To Me

"Have you heard about the murders?"

Phils breath hitched. That was fast, usually they think it's a suicide for about a month, maybe they're beginning to connect them. Of course he heard about the murders, he fucking committed them. Phil looked down at his baby, he had his head rested on his chest while phil held a protective arm around him, his scared brown eyes looking up into his. Slowly, phil nods.

"I'm scared, what if they get me?" that sentence, that fucking sentence. It sent him up into a fit of anger almost, it made him want to wrap his hands around someone's throat and-

"Don't worry sweetness, no one will ever hurt you, I'll fucking kill them if they do," he growled. Dan, of course, thought this was a joke, and giggled softly at the remark, muttering a quick, 'don't swear daddy!' Jokingly to the end of his sentence, phil was not joking.

Phil didn't want to kill. He didn't want to hurt anyone. It was just the only way he could make money. He's not a sociopath, or a psychopath, and he doesn't say that blindly, he's explored the options, he kills people for fucks sake. No, he feels empathy, he feels sympathy, it's just selective.

Every kill, every murder, he gets payed for it. It all goes towards buying a house and food. He would feel sorry for them, but each person is killed for a reason, and most of the people he kills are bad. Besides, after what he's been through he can't really find the need to care, no harsh feelings, strictly business, as some would say.

He can care. He cares for dan, he cares for Brandon, he cares for Alex from his gang, and Dan's friend Alex from the drama club (despite not knowing him all that well), he cares, and he's sure that he would die for some of these people.

He loves dan, he loves dan so much. It hurts him to see him hurt, and kills him to see him upset, even if it's just another baby fit. Every single emotion dan has, phil takes it in deeply, with or without the whole daddy thing. He's not a psychopath, a sociopath, though he might be crazy.

"It's your mum," dan mutters softly, looking at his phone. Phil rolls his eyes, and almost in a fit of anger, snatches dams phone off him and answers the call quickly.

"Why the fuck are you calling my boyfriend Janice?" He spits angrily into Dan's phone, his words almost toxic. His mother, if he could even call her that, tries to make up a half assed excuse on that she was trying to warn dan on his old criminal charges, "oh my god shut up, he knows about those. yes he's with me now. Dan I used to be a drug dealer. Shut up, YOU chucked ME out. Fuck off. No. Oh my god. No I won't tell you how I make money." He angrily hangs up the phone.

"I thought I told you to block my parents?"

"I might have forgotten about your mum? I'm not sure, it's not like she calls me," dan whines loudly.

"Watch your tone young man," phil threatens before softening his voice, "that's fine baby, it's not your fault she's a bitch."

"Daddy! No swearing!" Dan whines again. Phil realises how Dan's feeling, grinning softly. He places his chin on his boyfriends shoulder, turning his head slightly so that his lips softly touches his.

"You feeling little, baby?" Dan turned to him and kissed him loudly on the lips before nodding quickly. Phil lays a protective arm around dan as he slowly drifts off into a deep sleep.

When he wakes up phil is no where to be found, he calls his name a couple times before realising that he's definitely gone.

Dan pushes himself off the couch and walks over to the bathroom in the far end of the house. As soon as he opens the door his nose wrinkles in disgust. He shakes his head momentarily before stumbling forward onto the wet ground with speckles of mud patterned around it.

Neither dan nor phil ever used this bathroom, it's dirty and wet constantly, the last time dan used this bathroom was when he ran into it while running away from max and Ella a year and a half ago, when he was still in school. Hes been out of it for months, and because of that has began to notice a strange tint in Phil's behaviour.

He goes to gang meetings a lot more than he thought we would, he spends a lot of time planning and working, and a hell of a lot of time in the backyard, near the back garden.

Dan had found out that phil didn't have a day job, and considering the stuff he could afford, he realised something was up.

The bathroom floors covered shoe prints, all leading to the cabinet. He open it up to find an array of weapons all stacked on too of each other, and not being daft in the head he put two and two together, judging by the blood on them. His head hurt; dan couldn't think of anything he could possibly want more than to die in that moment. The man he trusts, trusted, so much, and now he wasn't even sure if he should be anywhere near him.

He feels a fit of panic coming on, Phil is important, he can't live without him. He needs phil to survive, but phil might end his life, but he might die without him, but- but-

It becomes all to much, his head aches, he feels floaty. Dan's breathing speeds up and his palms begin to sweat, he tries to stand up supporting himself on the cabinet. Dan closes it and begins staggering out, his chest still struggling to  breathe properly.

Phil comes out of the house and runs over to him, "darling baby, are you okay?" He asks. Dan tries to reply but chokes on his words. Phil grabs him and guides him inside speaking to him in a soft voice and rubbing his back.

He needs phil, phil is safety, he must stay, even if he wants to leave.