Chapter One:
Lana awoke with a start clutching at the bear he gave her just before he left. How many days had it been now? Forty two, she had started to lose count around the thirties, but not completely. Every night had been the same since he left her, empty. Her depression was overwhelming. She had nobody, and everyday it was the same. She'd sit by the window, waiting until he'd return and proclaim his love for her. Telling her how very sorry he was, and that he'd never leave her again. Part of her knew he would never return, that he was happier without her. Yet her love for him left her vulnerable and completely, utterly alone.
"Today will be different" She tried silently convincing herself. She threw one of Dylan's baggy hoodies on, realizing what she'd just done, she yanked it off and threw it to the farthest corner of her room. Then she curled up in a ball and cried for the first time. Lana cried because he left her, but her real reason was because she had thrown everything away for him. Derek told Lana that he didn't approve of her friends, they weren't his type. Then Lana started avoiding them, they had tried to talk to her about it, tried to work it out but she wouldn't listen. She pushed away the only people that actually cared about her for a guy she met a few months before. She knew now that it was too late, that no matter what she said, her friends or ex-friends would never take her back. They were gone, but it was worth a shot. With her eyes filled with tears she pulled out her phone and tried messaging Jenna. "Hey Jenna, it's me. I'm really sorry, I should've listened to you.. Can we meet up and talk?". Lana realized that she shouldn't have bothered trying to work out her issues with Jenna after she got the reply. "I don't know who this is.. Your number isn't saved into my contacts. Lol who is this?" At this point Lana was now sobbing, she grabbed her knife as she pressed the blade to her wrist and pulled back. Blood was pooling to the surface of her open wound, she brought the knife down upon herself again and again wincing as it sliced through her skin. When she had finally stopped, she looked at the damage she had done to herself. She wouldn't need stitches but it would definitely scar, and she'd need to wear long sleeved shirts for awhile.
