Forgotten

Forgotten: Chapter One

Hey guys, this is my first attempt at writing a story. It's an idea I've had for a while so I decided to put all these thought I have somewhere where people can read them and maybe relate. Let me know what you think :)

Forgotten: chapter one

I wanted to die, plain and simple. I wanted to grab the bottle of pills on my nightstand and swallow them all.

All I knew was that I couldn't die, not yet.

So instead of swallowing the pills I grabbed the blade I kept with me at all times and drug it across my wrist.

I watched as little beads of crimson blood surfaced on my skin. I didn't feel pain, I just felt hollow. I needed more, more slashes on my arm.

So I made more.

Large lines criss crossing my left forearm. I swore quietly. Underestimating how much I would bleed.

I walked slowly across the hall, trying not to hit the boards I knew would squeak and wake my mom who was sleeping softly down the hall.

I turned on the water and rinsed the blood off of my arm, wincing as the water made its way under my skin.

I sat down on the closed toilet seat with a wash cloth pressed to my arm waiting patiently for the bleeding to stop.

It was late, after midnight and I had to start getting ready for school in six hours.

I was tired, physically and emotionally. All I wanted to do was sleep for a very long time.

So I did.

I went back into my small room and closed the door softly behind me. I turned off the light and fell into bed, exhausted, and waited for sleep to come.

It didn't.

It was after three when sleep finally came. It wasn't peaceful, it was a haunted sleep, disturbed by dark dreams.

My alarm went off at 6:30 and I felt as if I hadn't slept at all.

I pulled myself out of bed and walked tiredly to my dresser, grabbing a plain black sweater. I paired that with plain blue skinny jeans and plain black converse. My clothes were plain, just like me. Nothing special.

I slipped my arms carefully into the sleeves careful not to tear open cuts that were still red and raw.

After I was dressed I stood in front of my mirror staring at myself. Picking out and critiquing all of my flaws. My eyes are too small, as was my mouth and nose. My feet pointed inward and I stood awkwardly.

I hated everything about myself, I was plain with brown hair and dark brown eyes.

I grabbed my simple black messenger bag and slung it over my shoulder, careful to avoid hitting cuts.

With my phone in hand I headed downstairs.

"Good morning Alice," said my mother cheerfully.

"Morning," I said quietly.

"Are you hungry?" She asked.

I shook my head, I never ate. I starved myself. I had to be perfect. Or try to be.

"I'll get something at school," I lied.

"Alright, have a good day honey," she kissed the top of my head.

I walked out into the cool autumn air. Red and brown leaves crunched under my shoes as I walked along the cracked sidewalk.

I walked quickly in silence to my school. The cold Minnesota air making it difficult to breathe. It would snow soon, I hated the snow. It kept everyone indoors. Winters made my depression worse.