John Wick One-Shots

A Pencil Can Be Your Best Friend

John had a long day.

He took another job from Viggo, this one was especially tiring.

He eliminated one of Viggo's main competitors on the arms and drug 'business'

He reported to Viggo and got a cool 600K for the job, and Viggo even invited him to a bar for drinks. John thought he deserved a little reward so he went along to blow off some steam and enjoy a couple of peaceful hours with a good friend.

He ordered a lemon vodka, while Viggo ordered an olive martini. 

"John, do you need a break for a little while? I realize I've been giving you a few jobs too many and I'm sorry for that."

John looked back a little confused but appreciative. "Thanks Viggo, I think I would benefit with a little vacation here and there."

Viggo replied with a warm smile, while the two were friends and partners, Viggo made sure TO NEVER upset John, he may be a nice and respectful man, but if you crossed him, he'd kill you without a second of doubt. Which is why what happened next put him on edge.

John walked up to go to the bathroom and accidentally dropped a man's drink on the way.

"I'm terribly sorry, here let me pick that up" John said in a kind tone.

But the man who's drink had dropped was clearly drunk and so were his other 2 friends, they went crazy, cussing and swearing at John until they ran out of breath. Viggo didn't want the situation to escalate any further and he grabbed John's hand and escorted him out.

"Yeah, that's right, run away, PUSSY!" one of the drunkards yelled.

John, in the calmest and politest manner possible, whispered, "Piss off." That sent the men into a frenzy, one grabbed his gun and held Viggo at gun point while the other 2 bludgeoned John to the ground.

At this point, everybody in the bar had left, terrified. Even the bartender ditched! But on the floor, John spotted a pencil about 50 centimeters away from him. Since these morons had ruined the only fun John had in over 3 months, he decided he'd take something from them too. Their lives.

He swept the leg of the man holding Viggo at gunpoint and grabbed the pencil, the man was now on the floor and John took the opportunity to the stab the man right in the chest with the pencil, it didn't do much damage at first, but he kept striking it down until it penetrated the heart.

The 2 men, with faces of absolute terror, watched as John pulled the pencil out of their comrades' heart and they saw its bloodstained surface. John then elbowed the other mans neck causing him to choke, while the man desperately tried to gasp for air, John leaped onto him and punctured the middle of his throat with the pencil.

The man started to choke on his own blood and died a painful death over the course of the next couple minutes. The graphite had now broken leaving John without a weapon, so he decided to improvise (as if using a pencil wasn't already improvising) he used the rubber end of the pencil and jabbed the last mans eye with it, leaving the man temporarily blinded, while he stumbled back, John grabbed his collar, dragged him to a pillar and broke the pencil in half.

He then proceeded to jam the eraser side of the pencil into the column with the sharp, pointy part facing outwards. He took the man by the forehead and impaled the back of his neck with what was left of the pencil.

John went to a stunned Viggo and asked him for a phone, Viggo handed his over, knowing what John was going to do next.

"Charlie, you there? Yeah, I need a dinner reservation for three. You can? Great."

Minutes later, the three bodies were completely cleaned up with no trace of John ever being there whatsoever. 

"You know what Viggo, I think I'm gonna pass on that vacation stuff, if you need me, give me a call."

Viggo replied with gratitude and John drove off in his 1969 Mustang. From that day on, Viggo had established John's nickname, 'Baba Yaga.' A fitting name as in some cultures, it meant 'Boogeyman.' 

A frightening name...

For a VERY frightening man.