I Thought Love Existed

1.26.14

I Thought Love Existed

Romeo and Juliet

That's how it all started

No

It all started with a phrase

The simple phrase that made me think

Is this him?

Is this my Romeo?

-

I was only in sixth grade

An innocent girl

Is that why you picked me?

Because I was easy to fool?

And craving the love I hadn't seen?

-

Nothing had changed the next year

Except one thing

You went to the point of annoying me every day

-

In elementary, they taught girls that

If a guy is mean to you

It means he likes you

Of course I believed it

I was just an innocent girl, remember?

A naïve, innocent girl

-

So when you told me you loved me

I believed you

I drank in every word

You ever said

-

You were so sweet

You even tried to woe me

With Romeo and Juliet

Sometimes just Shakespeare

-

You said I was beautiful

Snuck into my class when you had the chance

Held me when I cried

You bought me chocolate

A teddy bear

You even "proposed" to me

-

You never really loved me

A boy who loves me

Will respond to my texts

Get along with my friends

Hang out with me more

Introduce me to their parents, or at least, siblings

Talk to me at their fucking graduation

-

What was it?

A dare?

Did someone dare you to date me?

A race?

Was it a race between you and your best friend to see who won me over first?

Or worse.

A game

Let me guess.

I was the piece and you were the master

-

I was so easy to fool

So innocent

So naïve

So of course

You took the chance

And made me fall for you

-

Guess what?

You won the race.

I hope you're happy.

But there's more.

You were winning the game,

But now? You lost. Because I just quit.

I don't want to be just a piece in your games.

-

So Congratulations.

You've torn my innocence

Destroyed my hope

And broken my heart.

Look at what you've done.

I hope you're happy.

Because you've turned an innocent girl

Into a broken one.

-

Love?

As if.

You never loved me.

In fact you only ever said 'I love you'

In front of my friends

-

I told you

All I've ever known is heartbreak

And what do you do?

You add to the list of heartbreaking events

-

You broke me.

You broke my heart.

I hate you now.

Do you care?

No, probably not.

-

I'm glad we never took pictures together

Because they would be burning in a fire right now.

-

Remember the teddy bear?

The sweet, small, white stuffed animal that holds a heart in its hand?

It's been in a bag, collecting dust.

Snip, snip.

Listen as I cut the heart out of its hands.

And oh how I wish you were here

To see me throw it away.

-

Because that's what you did.

You threw my love away.

-

Silly me.

I thought love existed.

-J