Misery (Klaine)

Chapter 9: Frank

The song in this chapter is Let Me Love you (Until You Learn To Love Yourself). Listen to full Glee version. Not performance.

__________________

Kurt:

I walked into my house and led Blaine to my room. I shut the door behind us and sat on the bed. My heart thumped in my ears as I tried to catch my breath. I settled Blaine onto my bed before I began.

"When I was eight, I started to take ballet classes. The first few week were fun and good until we got a new teacher... Mr. Frank Mast. He was tall and strongly built. He had wavy hair that he often ran a hand through."

I wasted useless details in order to prolong the details I hated. I glanced up at Blaine. He had his head cocked to the side, intently listening.

Do you have the guts to tell him?

"A week after Mr. Mast took over, he picked me out of the group. It was all girls but I thought that I might be commended for my good work.

"I walked into his office and he locked the door behind me. He started..." I struggled to speak, "touching me. He told me that it was okay. That this happened to everyone."

Blaine took my hand. An image of Frank running his hand down my chest and to my pants flooded my mind. My dad kept paying for my lessons but I couldn't tell him that I didn't want to go. I was afraid that Frank would find me. I was only a kid. I didn't know what he was capable of.

"Then things got worse. When I was ten he made me... suck it. I had no choice. He said that he would tell my parents that I liked it when he touched me. The sad part was that what he said was true."

It was true. I felt so much when he touched me. I don't know why I felt that way. It was like my body was belonging to someone else. Someone that hated me and only wanted to cause me more pain.

"Then when I was fourteen he..." my lungs refused to take in air. That day ran through my mind. I clenched my stomach as I tried to breathe.

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*Four Years Ago*

I sat in his office chair, terrified. My hands trembled as I placed them on my knees. I took a deep breath to calm myself.

I heard the door squeal open behind me.

My body tensed and awaited command. I took in deep, hard breaths before I heard his voice in my ear.

"I want you to take off all of your clothes."

I did as told. I didn't dare look at him as I did so. I would be hurt if I disobeyed him. Nothing hurt worse than having your groin whipped.

I stood exposed in front of him with my eyes to the ground. He placed a finger under my chin and forced me to look up into his eyes. He pointed to an ottoman in the far side of the room.

"I want you on all fours over there."

His hand went around my neck as he pushed me in the direction he had pointed in. I was on my hands and knees when my arms were ripped from under me and placed behind my back.

I saw between my knees. I heard his belt buckle unlatch and it slide from the loops. I felt the dry leather wrap my wrists tightly. I was tied up, unable to move. My ass was in the air and exposed for all to see.

Frank left the room but kept the door propped open. I was helpless, my ass in the air, hands bound... The only thing I could do was see between my knees.

I never knew why he left but I dared not think about it.

While I'm in this position, I'm seeing the door. I'm shaking at who could come in and see me like this.

And then it happens.

I see the door slightly open. I hear it close and the lock latch. I see feet cautiously, nervously walk in. I don't hear footsteps but I see his legs walking closer to me.

I see him push his pants down to his feet as I tremble in front of him.

I feel a burning, stinging sensation as he shoves himself inside of me.

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*Present*

"And that's my story," I said. Blaine looked at me in shock. He was probably thankful that he hadn't slept with me.

"Holy crap... Kurt, why haven't you... reported it?"

"Because I knew that no one would believe me over him."

Blaine took me into a bear hug. It was as if he had never hugged me before and would never hug me again.

I pushed away from him.

Why did he hug me? Did he not think that I was dirty and used?

"Kurt, why did you push me away?"

"Because," my eyes started getting teary, "how am I supposed to love someone else when I don't even love myself?" I laid back in my bed, defeated.

"Then let me lo-" Blaine stopped mid-sentence and suddenly got up. He strode over to my stereo and turned up the volume on the melodic music that started playing. The sound of the piano rang in my ears.

"Much as you blame yourself
You can't be blamed for the way that you feel
Had no example of a love
That was even remotely real
How can you understand something that you never had
If you let me I can help you out with all of that.

"Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
Let me love you
I know your trouble
Don't be afraid, oh, I can help.

"Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
Let me love you
A heart of numbness
Gets brought to life
I'll take you there.

"I can see the pain behind your eyes
It's been there for quite awhile
I just wanna be the one to remind you what it is to smile
I would like to show you what true love can really do.

"Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
Let me love you
I know your trouble
Don't be afraid, oh, I can help.

"Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
Let me love you
A heart of numbness
Is brought to life
I'll take you there

"Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
Let me love you
I know your trouble
Don't be afraid, oh, I can help..."

Blaine came over to me and placed his lips on mine. I let myself pant with need for him. More of him. All of him.

I knew that I could trust Blaine. I could count on him. He would always be beside me, every step of the gruesome way.