[Shawn Mendes:]
I am pretty and 17
I have no clue what heartbreak even means
But I made this song about it
After my girl dumped me, that cold hearted witch
What was that?
It felt like I just got punched
[Mysterious voice:]
Your Ex-Girlfriend sent me to kick your butt!
She said make sure he needs to get stitched up
[Shawn Mendes:]
That Hurts!
She took this song too literally
I meant stitches metaphorically
Wasn't it enough that she left me?
Now she wants me to bleed
Who is that hitting me?
[Mysterious voice:]
Here's a clue
I say "You cant see me!"
I wrestle men is big arena's
[Shawn Mendes:]
Um are your John Cena?
[John Cena:]
Yep!
[Shawn Mendes:]
What did I do to deserve this?
[John Cena:]
On her birthday you got her nothing you dick!
Instead you got yourself this car!
[Shawn Mendes:]
I needed to look more badass
[John Cena:]
And that's why I'm kicking your ass!
[Shawn Mendes:]
Someone save me from this wrestler dude!
[Kylo Ren:]
Now you'll learn the power of the Dark Side
[Shawn Mendes:]
Don't tell me my ex also sent you
[Kylo Ren:]
That's right
Remember
On this past Christmas Day
You got her nothing, now you must pay
Instead you got that dumb jacket!
[Shawn Mendes:]
Hey I look badass in it
[Kylo Ren:]
How dare you be so selfish
[Shawn Mendes:]
Ouch! Stop That!
She was being a bitch!
[Kylo Ren:]
You see the power of The Force now
[Shawn Mendes:]
Who's poking my ass? Ow!
[Harry Potter:]
'Twas me Harry Potter
Your ex girlfriend is my witch daughter
I'm gonna
Take my broom from Quidditch
And beat your butt with it!
[Cupid:]
Valentine Day's coming
Got to turn this pain to loving
This brutal violence is senceless
I must save Shawn Mendes