flashback

s i c k s

Fletcher

When I approached the door, Sarai and Matt stood with Danyelle and a huge guy. I jumped, but Matt reassured me that he was our friend. I didn’t trust him right away, and didn’t let him come inside. I just stood there awkwardly watching him, until Danny winked at me and told me that “Mario” was going to help us. He worked at Pizza Palace on Eaves Boulevard. Mario looked me right in the eye and told me that he would be willing to bring us which ever type of pizza we wanted whenever we wanted. Too bad I wouldn’t need them. He offered me a fist bump. I bumped him, and we were immediately pals.

“I brought you this,” Danyelle said, handing me a box of warm pizza. I opened it. Peppers and cheese wafted me warmly in the face, and I looked at Danyelle with gratitude. She gave me a big hug, and I hugged her back. Sarai and Matt brought plates to the counter, five for all of us. Mario looked big enough to eat up the whole pizza, but he restrained himself and served Danny, Matt, Sarai, and me first before himself.

“It’s spicy,” he warned us. “Ya’ll got anything to drink over here?” he looked around the deli.

I jumped up and brought a 2-liter bottle of Coke from the storeroom. Danny looked at it, then me, but I quickly told her and Mario that Joe, the previous deli owner and a family friend, still had orders coming in from the Pepsi Cola Company, which Ceon tried to pay for with the small—extremely small paycheck he got from the supermarket where he worked. He also had orders from Boar’s Head and Frito-Lay, but the other orders had expired since we couldn’t pay for them. Mario looked truly sorry.

Danny patted my shoulder.

“But it’s okay,” I reassured her. “Because we’re getting out of here.”

“How?” she asked.

“We’re leaving Studebaker.”

She gasped out loud, just seeming to notice the bags packed and stacked around the room.

“But… but what about Ceon? And you guys are leaving him behind? You can’t!” She turned to Matt, who turned away, his face red. She resorted to Sarai, who didn’t make eye contact.

“We have to.” I said quietly.

“Why do you guys live in this crummy alley anyway?” she asked. “So that you could stay together as a family! I will help you get food and clothes, but I can’t help you leave your brother behind.”

“Believe me, Danyelle. It’s hard for us too, but Ceon can’t pay for all three of us to live. We’re a burden to him. He can’t continue stressing himself out like this. Maybe we’ll see each other again someday, but wherever we end up, we will be able to provide for him. We will keep in touch with each other. We can’t continue living like this.”

She just looked at me, shaking her head. “I can’t do this; no matter how mean Ceon may have been to me. I am an only child, friendless—“ Mario looked hurt. “Except for you Mario,” she said, “I have never known what it is like to have close-knit family like you have. You have been together through thick and thin; you can’t just throw away your family like that!”

“You have to help us!” I said, anxiously. “We have to leave before Ceon gets back. We…”

“You what?” Danyelle demanded.

“We thought we could count on you.”

She sighed and looked at Mario, who shrugged.

“But… you’ll come back for him later when you’ve found a family to love and take care of you?”

I nodded, and thought about how he had threw away my picture of Mom and Dad, or did God knows what. So did Sarai and Matt.

“Okay…” Danyelle hesitated. Tears filled her eyes and she wiped them on her sweater sleeve.

She stood up and threw away the paper plates and leftover pizza. “Get your bags, guys.” I said to Sarai and Matt.

Mario took the heavy book bags from them and ran his hand through his hair. Danyelle looked at her watch and opened the door. Sarai was the last one to leave. She closed the door quietly behind her and kissed her hand and placed it on the door. Matthew took her by the hand and the five of us walked up the stairs.

Goodbye, Joe’s Deli.

Danyelle

We walked quietly along the sidewalk, S&M having a discussion of gibberish word in front of us. Mario led the way to the train station. Fletcher and I walked behind everyone, side by side. He kept glancing over to me, but I didn’t look back. When we got to the train station, I stopped in front of the steps. The street was silent, except for something S&M called their “froufrou language”. I handed Fletcher his knapsack and saluted him. He opened his mouth to say something—goodbye, I thoughtand turned around. I began walking up the steps when I felt a hand on my shoulder swivel me around. I turned to face Mario. Behind him was Fletcher, hunched over.

“What’s wrong with him?” I asked Mario.

When he heard my voice, he rose up. Tears streamed through his hands.

“Fletchie?” Sarai ran to him, patting his back for him to rise up. “What happened?” she looked at me. Matthew ran to me and tugged on my sweater. “What happened to Fletcher, Danny?” he asked me. All I could do was look down at him like a big, fat drip.

“Tell you what, Fletcher.” I said, my voice shaking. Mario nodded at me, and I continued. “You send a letter to the deli telling Ceon what happened as soon as you get to wherever you’re going. Tell him where you are, and explain if you’re safe. Tell him how to get to you guys.”

Fletcher nodded enthusiastically, but the tears kept streaming from his face. I felt my throat closing up like a big potato was blocking it up. Stop it, emotions. Fletcher stared at me as I walked toward him. He made an effort to wipe his face, but couldn’t stop hiccupping. At the time I didn’t realize that while Fletcher was extremely mature, he was only eleven. He couldn’t handle the pressure of having to find a home, handle Sarai and Matt at the same.

            At the time I didn’t realize the colossal mistake I was making. All I did was reach into my bag and handed him all the bills I had in my wallet: about $41 in all. His eyes widened and he took the money quietly. Mario opened his own wallet and gave him a twenty-dollar bill. He took Mario’s money too. I made an effort to smile at him, but I felt my lips trembling. “We’ll be o—okay, Danny,” he tried to reassure me, still hiccupping. I hugged him then, so tightly that I didn’t know I was so powerful. He hugged me back. “Thanks for everything,” he said. “Thanks, Danny,” Matthew and Sarai chorused beneath me. I reached into my bag and handed the packs of gum I had bought for them. They grabbed them and each of them clung to my legs, hugging them tightly. Fletcher quietly dug into his backpack to reveal a tattered sketchpad. He flipped through it for a few seconds and ripped out a sheet of paper and gave it to me. It was a drawing of me, my mouth half open and my finger pointed to a light bulb floating above my head. My eyes were wide and shining, my posture slouching and my nails done shocking yellow. My hair was kinky curly, as usual, and out, barely grazing my shoulders. The light bulb and my nails were the only things colored, and it looked so real I was so amazed. I stared and stared, and finally just grabbed Fletcher for a hug again. Tears were in my eyes.

            Fletcher put out his fist for a bump from Mario, but Mario enveloped him a huge bear hug. A tear escaped my eye, and I swiped it away quickly. Mario gathered Sarai and Matt in his arms. “Thanks, Rio.” Sarai said quietly. “What did you call me?” Mario asked, quickly. Sarai looked startled. “I—I called you Rio.” Mario patted her curly head and grinned. “I love that nickname.” Sarai beamed her adorable toothless smile, her face sunny. I treasured her smile. I didn’t know the next time I would see it again. I looked down at my watch. 4:53. The train came at 4:55. I ushered them into the train station and gave them each coins to board. When the E train to Cretonne came rushing down the tracks, I kissed Sarai and Matt firmly on their curly tops, and hugged Fletcher tightly again. When the train doors opened, Fletcher grabbed Sarai and Matthew tightly by the hands and pulled them inside. Mario and I stood outside, watching them. They waved fanatically as the train left the station, my only friends saying goodbye. And before they escaped from sight, I could have sworn Matt mouthed, Love you, Danny.

I felt sick.