River woke up the next day well rested, and to the scent of cooking pancakes and rich maple syrup. He stretched, and rolled over to look out of his window, as he did every morning during the school week, to watch Alice and her brother get on the bus. But, the bus rolled to a roaring stop in front of her house, idled for a moment, then pulled away again. River frowned, and his eyebrows furrowed together. He opened his window and reached out to check the plant that she always left him notes in. All he found was the ziploc bag that she left the notes inside, to protect them from getting wet, as she only wrote in ink.
He looked back at her house, and at her rounded window, but from the distance, he couldn't see anything. Still worried, he got out of bed, and went down the hall, his bare feet making small padding noises on the slick hard wood floor.
"Morning, River." His mom smiled at him from where she stood at the stove making breakfast.
"Morning," he murmured as he sat down at the round kitchen table.
The entire day, River was unable to focus on his school work, no matter how hard he tried.
"Maybe Alice and Erin are sick.." He said to himself, as he flipped open a book at his desk.
The next day was the same, and the same worry gnawed deep in River's stomach. He found himself glancing out the window towards her house every moment he could, watching that round window for any sign of her.
The third day, River woke up burning with determination. If she didn't show all day, he was going to come to her. It was Saturday, technically one of the days off school, but since he had so much leftover work from the past week he put his pent up energy into tackling it. By the time he was finished, the smell of dinner was wafting under his bedroom door, Alice's favorite, Chinese. Once River and his parents finished eating, his mom handed him a big Tupperware bowl, since she knew about Alice and Erin, and he scooped large helpings of everything inside.
He said goodnight to his parents, and gave his mom a hug, his dad just patted him on the back with a manly grunt of "Night, son."
He sat up in the dark of his room, with the Tupperware bowl clasped in his hands, still slightly warm, eyes fixed on her window.
He shifted uncomfortably once, then twice, before hopping up to use the bathroom, reluctant to stop watching for her.
"I'll only be gone a minute," he said more to himself than anything, and left the bowl sitting on his bedside table.
When he returned, he went straight to the window, and almost yelped in surprise. Standing there just outside, was Alice.
Under the moonlight her dark brown hair looked black, but his attention was fixed on her eyes. They were ringed with deep dark purple circles, and her eyelids were puffy like she'd been crying a lot.
He flung open the window, and was about to climb out, when she startled him by moving the plants off the windowsill and climbing in.
"Alice?? What happened?" He whispered, his palms growing sweaty. He was nervous, he hadn't had a girl in his room since his tenth birthday.
She climbed onto his bed beside him with stuff movements, as if she were an old woman plagued with arthritis. Once she was comfortable, with a pillow behind her back and leaning against the wall, she started to speak in a raspy tone.
"Mark found out I had been outside.. He went up to my room and trashed it.. And when I got back inside, he came up there...." She broke off, rubbing her wrist absentmindedly, which River noticed was swollen.
Rage colored his vision red.
"We have to do something!" He reached out to touch her shoulder, but she shrugged away.
"Alice, let's go to the police, they'll help you.. I'm not just going to sit by and watch him-" he flicked his hand towards her house and scowled with disgust, "do this to you and Erin."
She shook her head, as if to rid her thoughts of something. "No, we can't.."
River fumbled, "why not? I don't understand..."
Her head snapped up and she looked at him fiercely, "no, that's right you don't understand! Sitting here in your cozy house with your two great parents and all the food you need!" Her voice broke, and she became quiet, looking down at his navy blue comforter and twisting the fabric between her hands.
River's cheeks stung, and so did his feelings, but he understood what she meant. He couldn't truly understand what it was like inside of her house, living with Mark.
After a moment, she murmured softly, "I'm sorry.. I just.."
"It's okay Alice, I know it's hard." River reached out and laid his hand over one of hers, and she looked up at him from under her thick eyelashes. His heart skipped a beat, and he withdrew his hand, he could feel it start to sweat.
"It wasn't always like this, you know.." She returned her gaze to his comforter.
"Yeah..?" River prompted, maybe it would help her to talk about it. And besides, she had never talked about life before her mother's death, and he felt as if they were having an intimate sort of moment.
"Mom was great.. She wasn't perfect but as close as I think a mom could be. She used to sing me to sleep when I was really little.." Her eyes were sort of misty, as she gazed out the window, across the moonlit lawn. River nodded, prompting her to go on.
"She was an artist too, you know." River leaned forward, Alice never talked about her artwork. It was a personal thing for her.
Alice continued, not noticing River's reaction, lost deep in her memories.
"She was good at drawing in pencil, she could draw practically anything she could look at. It was amazing, and I always wanted my artwork to look just like hers did. But of course it didn't, I was just a kid. And I'd get disappointed in myself.. But she always knew what to say to encourage me." Alice smiled, looking down now, her eyelashes creating spiky shadows down her cheeks.
But almost as suddenly as it came, her smile faded. "But.. I'll never forget the night I lost her.. We all lost her. We were in the car, and I remember it was dark, I was dozing on and off in the backseat. Erin was asleep next to me, and his head kept falling on my shoulder and I'd push him off. Back then, he grossed me out. I guess it's that age, cooties and stuff.. And it all happened so fast.."
A fat, shiny tear rolled down her cheek, but she didn't seem to notice.
"All I remember is one moment I'm shoving Erin's head off my shoulder, and the next there's all this bright light, and I could hear metal screeching like it was alive and dying. And there was this really awful burning smell, and I knew I was hurt but I didn't know exactly how.."
She sniffed, more tears rolling freely down her face. Her nose was red, and she fidgeted with her hands.
"I don't remember anything after that. The doctor says I went into shock.. And later the doctor says it's my way of coping with it, trying to keep my PTSD at bay.. We were hit by a drunk driver, mom died instantly.. Just like a candle, the brightest candle in my life, gone, snuffed out.. Nothing but darkness.."
She has started to rock back and forth delicately, but she shook her head a few times, the movement jerky, and unnatural. With one final sniff, she looked at him, puffy eyed, and sighed deeply.
"Thanks for listening to me, River." Then she leaned over, and he could feel his pulse quicken, but she pressed her lips to his cheek briefly. Without another word, she slipped back out the window, and he watched her dart back across the street, and climb up to her window before she disappeared into her room. Gently, he touched the place that her lips had been, so soft and warm.. And laid back onto his bed, thinking about everything she said, and her goodbye, tracing the outline of her kiss with his fingertips.
