tempted ➸ edward cullen

4 ; foreboding

this caused edward to punch the wall he was leaning against, "no, no, no. thats not how its going to be" he insisted.

"but thats not your call to make. im doing this and im doing it tonight" i boldly stated before walking away, slamming my bedroom door behind me, preparing for whatever was to come that night.

momentarily, i thought about running away. but what good would come out of that? victoria was capable of almost everything, and she wouldnt stop until she got me. subsequently either way, my family were in danger because of me, and i wouldnt have that. i pushed my bed towards the door to prevent anyone from entering. the remains of dust rose as i shifted my whole room about. a picture of some sort fell out of a jacket i threw across the room, and i scurried to see what it was.

as i peered down at the coffee stained picture, tears brimmed my eyes, it was a picture of myself and carlisle. 5 years ago. he'd been my doctor since i had cancer, and i was always drawn to him. i heard a banging at the door, my gut feeling was that it was carlisle, and so i moved the items in front of my door to let him in.

as i thought, it was him, he stepped one foot into my messy room and gave me a sympathetic look. "sit" he demanded, and i did as he said and sat on the edge of the bed, with the picture still tethered carelessly between my fingers.

"i remember this" carlisle began, looking down at the picture and sitting down next to me, "that was our third check up, you were so brave. you always were so brave - even when your health collapsed. when you were around i felt normal again, like you were my child, and i was a father, protecting you with everything that i had." he sadly continued. but it didnt stop there, "2 years went by, and i guess that was when i fully realised you were dying, and it wasnt fixable nor changeable. but i couldnt change you, i knew the dangers that came with changing you. clearly, though, something clicked three months ago and i couldnt handle seeing you suffer with every breath".

"you did the right thing" i reassured him, leaning my head against his muscly shoulder.

"maybe, but now youre in danger again. i understand that you want to do this for the better of us - but we cant let that happen" carlisle protested and i just sat there, frozen, waiting for him to continue, "you meet with victoria. but you have me and edward there for back up, in case things go sour. its not that we dont believe in you nor trust you. its simply because we know victoria, shes never short on her tricks.".

realising that maybe i did need their help, i nodded in agreement, "thank you" was all that managed to escape my lips after that. he gave me the sweet smile i always wanted to see before leaving. it was clear more than ever before at that point, i was ready to change, and i was ready bring down any threat in the process.

i reorganized my room back to its original state, placing the picture i ultimately wanted to keep forever, on my cupboard and stick it there with sticky-tack.

with nothing left to lose, nor gain, i headed out my room with an alarming feeling in the deepest pit of my stomach. something was going to go wrong, i could literally feel it. whilst heading towards my door, edward swung it open with an affectionate look plastered on his pale face. i bit down on my full lips before her speaks.

"if..." he began before trailing off, "when, we get through this, we're going somewhere. somewhere private. somewhere we can escape and be happy, together" he corrected himself and a small smirk played on my lips. could what rosalie said about him loving me be true? was that how he truly felt?

with the feeling in my stomach and the almost certainty of death looming in the air, i couldnt agree to what he saying, i didnt want to get his nor my hopes up. because if we focus on the minuscule percentage of me surviving this - there is no hope.

"and if i dont make it through this, you have to let me go. no revenge, no going after victoria nor her followers" i seriously demanded, i hadnt looked him in the eyes at that point, knowing it would be one of the last time i could potentially see them scared me. "you move on and live with carlisle and the others, in peace.".

edward did nothing in response verbally, instead he stepped closed towards me, taking my cold hands in his. the beautiful thing about being in love with a vampire? you didnt feel cold, your body ignited with flames with just one touch, you felt invincible and nothing could ever beat that feeling. he lifted my chin up to stare at him, i traced his features, mouth, nose, and the lastly the eyes. i saved them until last because i knew i would lose my train of thought - they were warm liquid gold framed by a thick fringe of black lashes. staring into his eyes always made me feel extraordinary - sort of like my bones were turning spongy.

moments of staring into each others eyes and i was about to pull away, but instead he pulled me into him, "stay still" he whispered, bringing his lips carefully to my own.

the kiss was special, something so delicate that could only be described as a vampires version of heaven. i pulled away and rested my forehead against his, panting at the kiss, force of habit i guess. i wanted to say 'i love you' but doing so would, in a hypothetical sense, be me saying my idea of goodbye. and i couldnt do that.

i knew dreadful events would occur that night; at least id die in a the presence of the two people i loved the most.

a/n: happy reading, please dont forget to considering voting (and feedback!!).