THRUST

Chapter 31

Rose doesn't give me a hard time about the look on my face when I notice Edward's car, but her smirk has me questioning if she has something up her sleeve.

I couldn't blame her if she did. I mean, it's no secret that my relationships have changed like the weather lately.

But Rose has no clue that I'm questioning Briggs' loyalty and where we stand.

She also doesn't know that in order to distract from constantly obsessing over my relationship with Briggs, I've allowed myself to indulge in fantasies of Edward. Like, all afternoon. It's all I can think about after that sweet dinner and then getting his texts and seeing those pictures. God.

I've imagined it for hours, just pulling him close and feeling his mouth on mine, having his warm hands on my skin one more time.

But every time I allowed myself the freedom to fantasize, the guilt of betraying Briggs got heavier. And then the doubts about Nahuel would sword fight the guilt, slicing it down... defeating it, convincing me that Briggs has betrayed me and all we set out to be.

But in his defense...  I'm the one that insisted Briggs be with me before he left, he did try to be noble and save me from feeling the way I feel now.

This is my life. Mind-fighting and over-analyzing every situation that involves Edward or Briggs. Which happens to be 75% of what I think about each day. It's exhausting.

I'm beginning to think that Edward's right. I'm too young for this much pressure. It would be much easier to just do what feels good and figure out the rest as I go.

.

.

.

Echoes of laughter and notes of faded music climb up from the back of the house as we approach the front door.

Rose grabs my hand as I follow her up the steps, through the house, and out to a large back yard. As we step out, the late afternoon sun peeks above the treetops and the smell of smoke from the firepit is heavy in the air. We pass through the laid back and lazy fun smiles and nods.

Rose stops to hug a guy she introduces as Murphy. He's a big burly Paul Bunyon type with brown shaggy hair who takes my hand as we're introduced, and turns both of us to his girlfriend Nora, who's almost as tall as Rose and has rainbow streaks in her hair. We're not short by any means but this guy makes all of us look like dwarves.

"Where's my evil twin?" Rose asks, looking up, with a bright smile in her eyes. Murphy looks to the side, and points to the large oak with lights strung along its limbs. It dips low illuminating the people underneath. "He's up tonight, so you caught him at a good time!"

Rose smiles, "So I don't have to worry about anyone breaking my brother's knees to squeeze his poker debt out if him? That's comforting." 

"I think he'll be fine tonight." Murphy's strong voice floats over us and I take a moment to scan the crowd. Lots of pretty girls and normal guys laced around that all look scholarly... certainly not the Clubhouse type guys. Not a soul here would look right on a bike aside from Rose and me. I feel a little out of my element but I shrug it off and chat with them for a minute before moving on as Rose pulls us towards the group by the tree.

The large group surrounds two tables covered in cards, chips, cups and elbows. Their voices rise over music that pours from two small speakers propped in the kitchen window and a much bigger one placed on a tree stump nearby.

"There he is." I hear her say and the expression on her face is pure love. I follow her gaze to the cute guy by the tree and I watch as he notices her from across the way, reflecting the same admiration in his eyes.