The Crazy Apes: A Satire of Human Society

Let Them Eat Cake

Modern society was founded on the principles of equality, fairness and freedom to achieve our dreams. These were not mere words; they were noble principles worth fighting for, and obtained only after much fighting and bloodshed on both sides of the Atlantic. Two centuries after the American and French revolutions, all the sacrifices made by our ancestors to establish a level playing field have been forgotten and now we simply pay lip service to those cherished principles.

What happened?

The following dialogue is between two chimpanzees named Abu and Mabu: I use A and M to distinguish the speaker.

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A: Why do some humans have so much more than others? Some have much more land, bigger shelters, more and bigger mechanical horses and more of everything.

M: It's simple; they work harder than others.

A: Are you saying that those that have very little in comparison are lazy by human standards?

M: But of course, the less they work the less they have! It makes sense to me!

A: But why is that some have so much more than most people? Just working harder doesn't explain it. After all, there are just so many hours in the day.

M: Clearly, those that have much more work smarter. By being smarter they can do much more. Doesn't it make sense to you?

A: You're saying that a small fraction of the human population is smarter than all the others and they work harder and make more; but if they were really smart wouldn't they work less?

M: You have a point there. Why do they work so hard?

A: Could it be that they're smart bullies who take advantage of other people?

M: Are you saying that smart people would take advantage of those less fortunate? Humans would never do that sort of thing! After all, they have high moral standards!

A: Then maybe they're not smarter, but just bullies with no moral standards.

M: How could it be? These are the leaders of the biggest human tribes, the leaders of the big habitats and the owners of the big smoke-producing factories. It can't be!

A: Why is it so hard for you to accept? Our alpha male is a bully, why wouldn't the human leaders also be bullies? How else would they become leaders?

M: These are civilized people you're talking about, people of integrity, with high morals and high social values. You can't compare them to our alpha males, who care only about food and sex. No. It can't be! Human leaders are outstanding citizens who are beyond reproach. They're not sex-starved fiends driven by greed like our bullies!

A: You may be right of course, but how do you explain this dichotomy? After all, if they're such high standing citizens with strong moral fortitude, why do they let some of their brothers and sisters go hungry and homeless?

M: I'm at my wit's end! I can't believe that intelligent humans can be so callous. If what you're saying is true, then our egalitarian society should be a model for them.

A: You have always given humans much more credit than they deserve. To me, they're just crazy apes.

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During the French revolution, Marie Antoinette, the Queen of France, couldn't understand why her people were rebelling. When one of the ministers told her that the people didn't have any bread, she reportedly said, "Let them eat cake."

Today, those founding principles receive only lip service on both sides of the Atlantic, and today's ruling nobility has also become well detached from the populace. Only a few days into the new year, they had already made what it takes some of us one whole year of hard work to earn. It's a net zero-sum game: the more they take the less is left for us. The pie is not getting bigger: they're taking more and more of it each year.

The sacrifices of those who fought for equality and fairness have all but been forgotten. Pity! 

How long will it be before we will be told to eat cake?