I'm Still Here (Numb3rs)

Conclusions

When she finally arrived home, she unwrapped the scarf around her neck and closed the door; her hand climbing the light as she flipped it on. She exhaled seeing the suitcase she had placed there earlier. Shaking her coat off, she placed it in the closet and walked up the stairs. It was well past midnight now and she was exhausted.

Walking down the hall, she reached her bedroom.  A small lamp on her nightstand glowed faintly beside the glowing red numbers of her alarm clock. It didn't take long for her to settle down as her head hit the pillow and her eyes closed shut. 

It almost seemed too soon when her alarm clock buzzed beside her four hours later. Her hand aimlessly hit the snooze button and she forced herself up in a sleepy haze. The light blue glow crept through her blinds as she stretched her arms over her head and slowly walked downstairs.

She knows she's going to need some coffee if she's going to function on what would probably be her third day on lack of sleep.  The chilling morning air rushes around her as she takes all the necessary steps to make coffee before hurrying back upstairs to the bathroom where she turns on the water to the shower. 

She takes a few minutes to let the water run over her body before lathering the shampoo through her hair, letting the suds run over her body as she washed her body thoroughly and turned the water off. Her head aches slightly as she dries off with a towel, but the faint aroma of coffee is enough to keep her going as she slipped on her robe and made her way to the kitchen.

The rich aroma draws her in further as she poured herself a cup and replaced the pot back in the cradle. Her hand wrapped tightly around the white coffee cup as she leaned her back against the counter. Her thoughts overtook her as she slipped her hand across the counter and flipped the stereo on with her free hand; music pouring the early morning silence as she walked back upstairs, closing the bathroom door behind her. 

Placing the cup to the side of the counter, she turned her hair dryer on the lowest volume, then pushed it up to full blast a few minutes later until her hair was partially dried. When that was enough, she plugged the curling iron and finished drying her hair and the music continued to echo throughout the house. 

Just like she always focused on cases, this time she kept her mind on Larry as she finished getting ready. The way he had offered to go with her for a couple days to keep her company. The way his lips would curl up in a smile as he met her at the airport as they sat together and talked about everything they loved while waiting for their flight.

She couldn't help but be glad she wasn't going alone. However, that also meant she would also need to focus on taking the time to find her own sanity. The resentment and confusion she felt with her father had been long buried. Now she felt like she was opening that can of worms again by visiting him. But if she didn't do something now, she would always be left wondering how things could have been and if they could have been changed for the better if given the chance. 

And now she could only hope for the best. She wouldn't exactly be disappointed if things between them didn't go well. But at least after this, she would be able to go on with her life without feeling that void that she had felt for years. The feeling that was deepening and rooting to the satisfaction and conclusion of her reasoning of leaving New York when she had settled in LA.

As soon as she had gotten dressed, put on her makeup and curled her hair, she unplugged the iron and slipped on her coat. At the top of the stairs, she took paused to take in a deep breath before going back down. She did one last check to make sure she had done everything she needed to do before she left. Of course, it was. Yet, she couldn't help but feel like there was still something she missed--like convincing herself that hopping on an airplane to visit her father was the best possible thing she could do.