Cards against Humanity: Titan Edition

Cards Against Humanity

"Did you get it?" Eren rushes over to see what you had hiding behind you back. You smile sweetly, eyes glinting of mischievously, walking further into the room you hide the box under your jacket.

"Did you?" Armin asks intrigued.

"Get what?" Jean asks, evidently uninterested. You reveal your treasured item and see delighted faces from your friends. Cards Against Humanity. The game that was hitting the city by storm, your parents had sent it to you for your birthday after saving all year. It had been outlawed by the higher class for being disgusting, but it didn't stop the games, in fact, according to your father, even the guards were playing it.

"I cant believe it!" Eren grabs it out of your hands and holds it up as if it is a priceless artefact! "Can we play it now?" You laugh, it was your night off for the holidays, so you may as well enjoy it, you nod excitedly and pull out the side table so you can all sit round it.

"Do you know how to play it?" Armin asks looking rather worried.

"Yes, basically you all get ten white cards then someone is the Card Czar, who picks a black card and will ask a question. You will have to answer that question or statement with one of your white cards. Once you have all done it, the Card Czar will pick the best one and that person wins the round and becomes the next Czar." You take a breath and set up the table, giving everyone their share of cards. "Right, when did everyone last go for a poo?"

"Wha-?" Jean seems flabbergasted that you had even said such a thing. Eren laughs and declares he did one first thing this morning, whilst Armin mumbles something about after lunch. "Well it was about three hours ago."

"Okay well it looks like it is me going first then, as the one who most recently went is the Czar first." The looks they gave were priceless; If this had got them then they were in for a treat when the real game started.

"Everyone ready?" They nod. "Right. First one. I learned the hard way that you can't cheer up a grieving friend with ..... So what can't you cheer up a friend with?" You watch them look at their cards, Armin's face filling with complete horror at the content of the cards, while Jean and Eren were practically beside themselves, sniggering like naughty children. "I'll turn away so I cant see you put down your answer and then I will reveal them and choose." It didn't take long for you to hear the cards being put down beside you. "All done?"

"Yeah." Jean answers with a giggle. You turn round and see three cards placed in front of you. "Okay... I learned the hard way that you can't cheer up a grieving friend with .....Laying an egg."

"I learned the hard way that you can't cheer up a grieving friend with .....Friction" This really made you giggle. "Last one... I learned the hard way that you can't cheer up a grieving friend with .....A bucket full of cat pee" Everyone giggled, whilst Armin blushed at the answers. You snigger along with the boys. "Friction though? Who would you cheer up with friction?"

"Well you might, maybe with Levi!" Eren gave you a Cheshire cat grin, as you give him an open mouthed look of fake shock and you laugh.

"I cant imagine dry humping Levi would cheer him up, do you?" Your giggling joining the chorus of your friends.

"I don't believe anyone has tried it."

You spin round in horror as you hear Levi's voice. Eren and Jean laugh even louder at his entrance as Levi walks further into the room. "Even if they did, they would not live to tell the tale." He gives you a sideways glance, eyes trailing over your now bright red cheeks and a small grin forms at the corners of his mouth. "I take it that this is the game everyone is talking about?"

"Yeah did you want to join us Levi?" You glare at Jean, as if you weren't embarrassed enough, but to sit through this game with him would be torture. Eren wiggles his eyebrows at you suggestively, you put your head in your hands and try to laugh off your embarrassment.