Kidnapped By Beyoncé

Red Lobster

"Get up, bitch!" I heard as I was waking up from my deep sleep. Beyonce slapped me on the face. Not gonna lie, I loved it.

"Tell me what you know, boy" she screamed at me. I looked around at my surroundings. It took me a minute to realize I was in Red Lobster.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Don't act coy. You know damn well what I'm talkin bout"

"Beyoncé, I really don't."

"We can do this the easy way, or the hard way..."

I just looked at her in awe. Even though she was definitely threatening me, I couldn't stop looking at her flawless skin and flawless hair. She was amazing.

Putting all this love for her beside, Beyoncé looked pissed. She wanted to tear my fucking head off.

"ENOUGH," she screamed, "JUST TELL ME WHERE HE IS!"

"Where who is, Beyoncé?"

"Jay! Who he been fuckin?"

"I have no idea. I thought that was a rumor"

She clenched her fists and took a swing at my marshmallow skin.

"WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I IS?!" She yelled in my face. "You're gonna tell me where my husband been or you're gonna regret it."

I stayed silent.

"You did this to yourself."

Bey pulled a phone out from her back pocket and began to dial a number.

"Hey Kelly is Michelle with you? Okay call up Solange and Momma cuz Jay's been unfaithful and this kid ain't giving in. I need y'all here so we can whoop his ass."

She hung up the phone and sat on the other side across from me at the booth. Bey began to eat lobster and crab. She broke the crab legs with her bare hands, looking me straight in the eyes while she did so. "Now we wait" she said with a mouthful of buttery biscuits.