My Drunken Mistake

Nerves

      El wanted the entire wedding, even the guests, to have a peacock theme to it so that was why I was currently slipping on my blue/turquoise sleeveless dress. Today was the day, Lou and El’s wedding day that is. A day that I had been absolutely dreading since the day Louis proposed. After our little lunch “date” yesterday, Liam and I had decided to be each other’s dates because we didn’t want to go alone.

I seriously considered not attending because Eleanor was stressing me out with all the last minute details, but Liam convinced me it wasn’t fair to Louis to do that. I put the final touches of my make-up on to hide the fact that I had gotten zero sleep the night before, had been crying all night and had puffy eyes as well as the fact that I had been puking my guts up all morning. Damn pregnancy.

Liam was waiting patiently for me by the door to my flat in just his beanie, a pair of baggy sweats and a tight fitting white t-shirt.

            “Was it just me or was that shirt clinging to all the right places?” I thought to myself, “Nah, must be these damn pregnancy hormones. I couldn’t possibly be attracted to Liam when I was in love with Louis, right?”

            “Ready?” He asked smiling. His smile was the perfect combination of cheeky and cute.

            “Yeah, I guess so.” I replied. We exchanged little talk on the way to the church. I was really nervous. I couldn’t possibly tell Lou that I was pregnant now, not with the wedding today. That’s way too much pressure on what is supposed to be a special day.

Thoughts of telling him kept going through my mind though. Eventually I would have to. My belly would get bigger and he’d suspect something. I could always just lie and tell him that it was someone else’s but that would cause more of a problem, especially since Liam knew. I even thought about terminating, but I just knew that I couldn’t handle taking away the life of an innocent baby. The stress that I felt right now was unbearable. I knew that I had to tell Louis the truth soon; I couldn’t keep this from him much longer.

We pulled up outside of the church where the ceremony was taking place later that day and I felt my heart constrict in my chest, I so couldn’t do this. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Liam unlocked the car doors but made no move to get out, so we sat there in silence for a few minutes. I looked at the church again. I honestly didn’t know what to do. I could’ve sat in Liam’s car forever just staring, trying to decide whether or not I should/even could get out or not. Liam put his hand on mine and looked at me.

“It’s going to be okay.” He said.

“You’re so sure?” I asked.

“C’mon,” he encouraged, “Your best friend is waiting inside to be married, and he wants you there.”

I faked a smile and reluctantly got out of the car with him. And arm in arm we walked into the church. To watch Louis, my best friend, the father of my baby, the love of my life, get married to someone else. Someone who wasn’t me.

***LIAM’S POV***

            I studied Alexa as she stared at the church. Her thumb rhythmically brushed the back of my hand. I knew it was just a nervous habit of hers, but it still sent chills up my spine. She was delicately biting her lower lip and occasionally her eyes filled with tears. Her breathing shuddered and I wished more than anything that I could alleviate her sorrows.

            I knew she hadn’t told Louis about the baby yet. I didn’t want to ask, but I couldn’t help but wonder when and if she would ever break the news to him. Today certainly seemed like poor timing, but how would Louis feel to discover this after he was already married? Did he love her too? Would he hurt her? My mind raced as my eyes wandered to Alexa’s stomach. Her other hand gently stroked her slightly swollen stomach. I knew she would be an amazing mother, but all this stress couldn’t possibly be good for her and the baby.