N.E Heartbreak

Chapter 21

Chapter 21
Stephanie

1992

"He's beautiful." Johnny says as he holds Wally in his arms and holds me up as we stand outside of the NICU window.

"Yeah. He is, the little guy." I agree quietly. I'm leaning on a walker and Johnny. After having my baby too many months early and losing so much blood, I was weak. Weaker than I've ever been and I hate it. I'm so used to protecting everyone (mostly Jacque and Cassie) that being the one who has to be protected makes me feel useless.

"He needs a name. They just keep calling him Baby Gill," Johnny says. Wally puts his hand on the glass when Johnny steps closer to look at our new baby. "He's just as chocolate as Wally."

"Yeah. I know," I stare at the tiny, dark skin baby. He's hooked up to all kinds of tubes and devices. It's heartbreaking. "He's a fighter though. Five months premature. He shouldn't be alive."

"God." Johnny says simply and I nod.

"Johnny." I say.

Johnny looks at me. "What?"

"No. No," I smile. "His name will be Johnny. Johnny Gill the third. Tre."

Johnny smiles widely. "Tre," He nods. He grabs Wally's hand and waves it. "Say hey to your little brother Tre, Wally."

Wally stares blankly at the baby that shouldn't even be alive. I smile at my family as I place a hand on the glass.

It hurt my heart to leave little Tre at the hospital when I was discharged. I wanted to take him with me but he was still so small that the doctor and nurses wanted to keep him longer until he could manage on his own.

Jacque and Cassie pushed back our performances that were set up for the end of June and through September— our "Summer Break/Back to School" tour. They didn't want me overdoing it and hurting myself. Nor did they want me traveling without Tre. I don't know if Tre will ever be able to travel like Wally has been able to. He's just too small and delicate. Someone else I have to protect.

Jacque just had her last child, a beautiful girl she named Jackson Hunter Bivins. All of the guys were against Jacque giving Jackson a boy's name but Jacque stood fast by the name, calling it gender neutral. They rolled their eyes when we explained it as a big thing in the late 1990s and throughout the 2000s.

Mike and Bobby, never really on good terms, have been working on ways to prevent us from disappearing in 1997 without knowing what happens for us— our moms' cousins to disappear in the first place. It has been frustrating for them and caused Bobby to slip up and do drugs again. He's stressing and won't let me help. None of my tough love is doing anything.

I even told him he couldn't be Tre's godfather but that hasn't done anything like it did for Wally. Bobby seems like he's spiraling worse than before.

"Steph, you heard that?" Johnny asks me groggily. His arm was around me as we laid in our bed together.

"No. You're dreaming. Go back to sleep." I shush him. I'm still weak and need my sleep.

This time I hear the noise. I sit up when Johnny does. "Go see what it is." I push him.

He reaches under the bed and pulls out a box. He gets a hand gun from the box and heads downstairs. I reach under my side of the bed and pull out a bat. I go into Wally's room and check on his sleeping form before following Johnny downstairs.

I have to lean against the railing as I make my way down the stairs. Johnny looks up at me when we hear someone shouting outside of our front door. I look at him in shock as I recognize the voice.