A forbidden love.

It's been a long, cold night. I thought to myself not making a sound. All of the boys where asleep and I didn't want to wake them. So, instead, I put my hair in a bun, grabbed my jacket and left the cold motel room.

As I was walking down the long and dark streets of Canada. I noticed something, someone, something...was following me.

Whoever it was it was fast, it caught up to me, grabbed my shoulders and spun me around to look at him. And then I stared, right into Matt Sanders (aka Matt Shadows) eyes. They were beautiful, I was tempted to kiss him. But remembered about my promise to Johnny. I can't betray him like that, he's my husband. But I have to do something about this forbidden and secret love I have for Matt. And then, for what seemed like a lifetime waiting for him to talk, even though it was only a few short seconds. He uttered out the words I've always wanted to hear.

"Nikki, I'm in love with you."

I froze, I don't understand how he found me. I ran away to get from that cold awkward motel as quiet as I could. But he found and heard me. What do I say? What is he's lying? What if it ruins my marriage? But at that point, I couldn't hide it any longer. Then, I opened my mouth only to hear the sound of an alarm clock cooing in the background. It was a dream. It's always a dream.

"Hey babe." Johnny hugged me as he spoke.

"Hey," I hug back, sad that it was all a dream. "What time is it?"

"Noon." He told me then pecked me on the forehead. "You and Matt partied pretty hard last night." He frowned as if he wished I partied with him more.

"Um I'm sorry I guess...?" Then there was a long pause followed by the quiet but dramatic entrance by Brian(aka Sinister Gates)

"Hey love birds, how's it going?" Brian asked as he looked through my bag.

"What are you doing?" I asked, upset he was invading my privacy.

"Just looking through your bag princess." Brian winked and kept looking.

"She's my princess not yours!" Johnny said in such a serious but funny tone.

Brian laughed. "Ok ok dude chilax I was just calling the girl a princess."

"Ok." Johnny nodded and agreed. Then, a lot of silence.

I sat there looking at the man I'm suppose to be in love with. I feel it still, the spark, but it's faint and dull. I want Matt to love me, but how do I leave Johnny for his best friend? Why does my love life have to be so complicated? Why can't I be normal and love one man at a time? Oh yeah that's right, life hates me! But oh we'll...I'll figure it out. Hopefully soon. But what I didn't know, was that it was going to be a long time until I found myself happy...