Not all is what it seems

Chapter 4

*Time skip. Maria had her kid and Harry is now back to his actual age, sorry but i don't to write labor pains, plus i'm lazy and just lost my grandma*

I smiled as Harry held his new baby sister, she was beautiful. With her silvery blue eyes and bleach blond hair, she was her father's spitting image. She was gonna break hearts one day. Her name is Elizabeth Lynn Malfoy. I glanced to my husband, who held our eldest. He was just the same, a spitting image of his father, his name is Jasper Raymond Malfoy. "She's beautiful, Mom," came Harry's soft tone. I smiled and said 'Of course,' while shutting my eyes for some blissful sleep. 

I was in a hospital, running for some strange reason. Reading the blurring signs ahead of me, looking for something. My heart clinched when I spotted my Uncle Dicky Ray crying against the walls of the hospital. No, no not here! Not this again! I begged my brain, Take me away from here! I struggled to break away from this haunting dream. My heart skipped a beat when I saw my Pawpaw Ronny, coming closer to me, tear streaks running down his wrinkled face. "She's gone. She died 30 minutes ago." I heard my uncle Tommy speak in his deep voice, his husky tone thick with tears. My heart broke, shattering in pieces to small to see. I broke down in tears, once again. Three days from now is my birthday. THREE! Why god? Why did you take her? Why did you give her cancer?! Why did you give us this pain?! Why her? Why didn't you leave her alone? She still had life in her! She was raising my little brothers! Why?! 

When I got home, my brothers and sisters left me alone to grieve in peace. They went to get food for dinner, I didn't care. I wasn't hungry, in fact I had no emotions whatsoever. I went to the kitchen to do dishes on autopilot, until i saw it. Glinting in the kitchen light was a steak knife, yelling at me to use it. As if in a trance of sorts, I lightly picked the beautiful purple steak knife out of the black block and dragged the tip across my milky white skin, getting irritated when crimson red blood didn't surface. I growled and did it a couple more times, harder than the last time. It still wouldn't bleed, but it did cause a red angry welt on my skin. I huffed in anger and washed the knife before going to take a scolding hot bath and putting on a black and grey Punisher shirt. 

I bolted up with the last action, and looked around in a fright to see Harry cuddling with his mates. I smiled and looked for my mate doing the same with our children in a protective embrace. I pushed down my left sleeve to see the red welt still there on my arm, as a tear slides down my cheek. I miss her, but I'm glad I didn't end it when I wanted to. I wouldn't have Draco, or Elizabeth and Jasper if I did.