Gone

   "Just open it already!" My best friend Ryan yelled. I stared at the tiny wrapped box in my hands. "But I didn't get you anything." I whined. She rolled her eyes as I slowly teared at the paper. I opened the plastic box and took out the long silver necklace. It had half of a black broken heart that read 'Sisters'.

   Ryan pulled out her necklace that was hidden by her shirt that was half of a white broken heart that read 'Forever'. We smiled at each other and hugged. "Thanks Ryan." "No, thank you Lily. For being more then my friend...for being my sister."

»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»

    I rubbed my thumb against my necklace. Three days, and I haven't moved. Three days, and I haven't eaten, nor changed or showered. I stayed curled up in my room in the same position, facing the wall for three days. The black dress stayed zipped up in a bag, haunting me from my closet.

     I was afraid to turn around. To see her again. That was one of the reasons I haven't moved. "Sweetie...we need to get going soon. If you don't want to go I understand but, a lot of people are expecting you." My mom said as nice as she could. "Move the picture..." I whispered. There was silence for a long while until I heard my mother's heals enter my room and take the picture out with her.

   I slowly turned around to make sure it truly was gone and got out of bed to my bathroom. My hair was a dull red and was starting to fade to its natural light brown color. I turned the shower on and put my dress on the back of the bathroom door.

  After my shower I put my plain black bra and panties on. I took out my blow dryer and make up bag too. Once my hair dried I put it into a perfect bun. I put concealer under my eyes to hide the bags and foundation all over my face, a little bit of mascara and eyeliner and I was done. I looked like I could be happy if I wanted to, like I was a normal teenage girl. But never again will I be one.

   I slid into the dress and put on some pantyhose and black heels. I never thought I'd ever go to a funeral at the age of 13.

»»»»»

   I didn't say a word. I just followed my mom and brother around the church. Many people from my school tried to talk to me...to say how sorry they were...but I didn't even look at them. I only looked at one person and she never dared to look at me or my family. I didn't blame her...I would hate me too.

   Once we entered the main part of the church where the casket was, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was an open casket viewing. People would walk past the casket and cry then touch her. I walked the opposite direction of my mom and brother and went straight to the casket. I gripped the end of the casket and bent over to look at her. Dead...lifeless...happy?

   They made her have a smile on her face. How pathetic. I'm sure she was very unhappy when she died. "I didn't believe them when they said you were dead...because your a fighter...or...were." I whispered to her. I turned around and sat right in front of her casket. I didn't  cry though, just sat there.

   My brother grabbed my arm and got me up, taking us to our seats. While the priest talked and acted as if he knew her I stared at the floor. I saw her boyfriend on the other side of the church, crying. In fact everyone was crying...but me.

   The church chorus began singing that one Ed Sheeran song at the end of his Give Me Love song as we left. They were preparing to lower her casket into the ground, but we had some time before that happened. "Lily...I didn't think you were coming." Her mom asked me. I gulped. "It was the least I could do." She scoffed. "Please...this is all your fault. She wouldn't be dead if it wasn't for you."