Fuckboy ↬ Nick Robinson Fanfic

10

It has been a month, and all I have managed to do regarding either Scar or Nick is pretty pointless. Scar still glares at me in the hallways, flipping her perfect hair above her bare shoulder with all the attitude she can pull, and I still leave love bites on a neck I should not touch. It has been a month of waste of time, and as my fingers held onto the door of my car, I calmly shut it closed and took a deep breath to shove the wave of panic traveling my entire being away. 

I looked around at the scenery that was all too familiar, the pavement corridor leading to the front door of her house, all the flowers blooming from the warmth that brought March which decorated the path perfectly, as if her name was written all over it, and everything that reminded me of how things were just a few months ago. I swallowed the lump in my throat and raised my fist to the height of my eyes, delicately knocking on the door that now stood in front of me. 

I waited a few seconds and the sound of heels crashing against a wooden floor came resonating in my ear drums, accelerating the pace of my heartbeat. 

It's only Scarlett, calm down. 

I could tell myself all I wanted, when I saw her eyes look up to meet mine through the window next to the door, my heart skipped a beat or two. I pressed my lips together and waited for her to open the door to at least hear me out.

"What do you want?" She questioned the second her face appeared in the door frame. Her bare arm was holding the door halfway opened while the other was holding onto the door frame, her defined and long fingers creeping out of the door. She was small regardless of how huge her heels were and the way she was dressed pinched me for a slight second as it reminded me of my best friend. Girly skirts and sparkly chokers with her usual flawlessly winged eyeliner as the cherry on top. 

"J-Just listen to me, okay?" I mumbled, staring at my feet.

She opened the door completely this time and moved out of the way to let me in, sighing out of annoyance. I awkwardly took off my shoes once inside and moved my body against my will to the kitchen table, where I sat down at the same exact spot like I usually did.

"I'm sorry," 

I furrowed my eyebrows and looked up in confusion at Scar, leaning on the counter. Before I could even open my mouth to say those exact words, Scar had beaten me to it, as if she could read my mind.

"What?" I replied after a few moments of silence, staring at her as she was looking down, opposing the direction I was in. Her eyes went up at the window that stood right in front of her face, and in a matter of seconds, her eyes went back to me, filled with tears.

"I'm sorry, Lar, I-I overreacted. It's just a boy. You were right, I never had feelings for him. I don't know him like you do. I'm sorry," 

I stood up from my seat and wrapped my hands around her tiny body, "Scar, I'm the one who should be apologizing," 

As much as I was relieved, I could not help but be puzzled by what was happening. One second she was telling me how much of a shitty friend I was, and the other she pours her heart out to me. It brought me joy to see her again and to talk to her rather than her ignoring me in the hallways despite me practically begging for her forgiveness. Was I really sorry, though? Even I cannot quite put my finger on the right answer to that question. I mean, someone who is sorry, truly sorry, will stop whatever it is that they are sorry about. Someone who really means an apology realizes that what they did was wrong and therefore will certainly not do it again. 

I kept saying I was sorry, but I also kept on seeing Nick. In a way, Scar was right. I am a shitty friend. Friends do not do those things to their friends, even if it is as childish as calling fucking dibs on some random guy. "That's just, like, the rules of feminism." 

Sisters over misters used to be our motto. 

And right now, standing in her kitchen with her crying in my arms, makes me feel like absolute shit. That, right there, is another reason why I need to distance myself from that troublemaker Nick Robinson. We might have had a good run, but Scar matters to me, and I will not make the same mistake twice. Scar is the one who is hurt and who is apologizing, yet she is the victim in all of this and I feel like an idiot to realize all of this just now, as if an epiphany had struck me after the damage had been done. 

Everything happens for a reason, they say. I sure hope so, because at least something would explain why it took me so long and why I have not ditched that devilishly attractive fucker yet. As much as I was content with the situation I was in, I could not help but feel this intense hatred towards myself deep down inside of me. 

Scar was there, ready to forgive me for being the perfect example of a shitty friend, and all that was crossing my mind was his face. His scent tickled my nostrils even though he was not there, his lips on mine, on my neck and his hands on my skin could not be erased from my thoughts and no matter how much I tried to convince myself the opposite, I was falling for him, hard. That was the alarm. It was ringing loud and clear, and Scar was my wake up call. 

"Scar, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I should have told you right from the beginning. I'll make it up to you, starting now. I won't talk to Nick again, I'm going to do what I should've done the moment you told me how you felt about him," I stated with a slight smile, attempting to hide the confusion and uncertainty in my eyes and the trembling through my voice.

"Lara, no. I was childish, I guess I was jealous and let it all on you. I wasn't in love, I didn't even know the guy. If you guys like each other, there's nothing I can do to split you. I love you and want your happiness, so if he's it, who am I to stop you?" she sweetly smiled, wiping a tiny droplet of water from her rosy cheek.

"No, I don't feel anything for him, it was fun while it lasted, but it was just a fling. It didn't mean anything for neither of us, Nick isn't really the sentimental type," 

"And neither are you," 

"But opposites attract, right?" I replied, giggling despite my intense urge to do anything but laugh, "How about a girl's night? Movies and hot chocolate?"

"Yeeeee!" Scar exclaimed as her eyes lit up. She grabbed my arm to lead me upstairs with a grin plastered on her face. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I frowned, knowing damn well who it was. 

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yo I'm back and I'm 18 now woo woo