I Apolagize For The Inconveniences

Bury It

  
   I never promised you anything I couldn't do. You always seemed to believe all I ever told you was lies. And you believed lies always contained the truth.
   You left me when I was breaking, you thought I was breaking because of what you'd thought I'd done. You threw me in a coffin and pushed it out to sea. I simply do not understand what it is you think I was capable of. I believe you give me too much credit. You and I both know I'm not clever enough to pull of what you think I did.
   It's cold you know? In this cell all I have is a metal door and a small window where all I can see is the sky crying endlessly. It doesn't leave me with much heat. I remember that in some book I read that hell is cold. I believe hell is cold. It is cold to prevent freezing souls from melting. That's the only way to keep us down here. They freeze us in place so we don't go.
  Sometimes I wish I'd done that to you but I know the guilt of seeing you like that would kill me inside. It doesn't matter though I appear to be dying inside anyway. With you. Without you. It doesn't matter. I'm going to die anyway. The gaurd told me my day might come earlier than I thought. I know he was probably just trying to scare me. He accomplished his goal. I'm getting used to wiping spit from my face. With luck I won't have to do it much longer.
   Thank you for leaving me. Leaving me naked on this cold ground beaten and bleading. Seething and barely breathing. Screaming and wishing i wasn't seeing. Crying. Nearly dying. Thank you for planing and stabbing. I would rather have you pull out my intestines than having to deal with this endless pain.
   I know it is foolish to dream of such a thing but I just wish I could see you one last time. I know after what has happened I will never see you again but I can't help but hope for the hopeless.