The tragic accident The true love (Ziam)

2 Zayn

I'am back in my house in London feels a little weird it was months since i have been here.
My base is Los Angeles now days and has been almost the last 2 years since i left One Direction.
I like it over there it's more easy to just be who i'am.
But things has been up and down lately.
Gigi and i have paused or broken up but we both feel media does not need to know that right away.
We are still close and best friends no hard feelings between us.
Gigi was the one to break things off she wanted me to be happy and asked what i was hiding i could not stay strong and keep up my fasade so bursted in tears i told Gigi my secret i have hide inside my heart for 5 years. I thought she would hate me, get mad but instead she hold me in her arms that night calmed me down and told me to take a break from everything go back to the UK for a couple of week think things over and for once tell the truth and open my heart.

So here i'am back in UK in my house in London.
I need to go shop i have nothing here just water and worse thing is scared to go to the grocery shop because i'am not in the mood for paps or fans not yet and not right now.

Maybe i will call Alberto my bodyguard if he can do it for me.

Everything looks like when i left my eyes land on a photo in my hallway it's from when me and Liam went fishing together when we had some time of between concerts in the states.

I feel the tears coming i have been i wreck the last 8 weeks since i got the news about Liam's accident. I wanted to take the first flight to be with him but then it all came over me how everything ended when i left One Direction. How hurt Liam was and begged me to stay but i had to leave i could not stay and i could not tell him why i told him 50% of the truth but not the rest 50%.

Don't think i have ignored Liam since the accident i have talked to Karen who has been keeping me up to date about everything she even asked me to come visit Liam because she is scared he will get depressed about all that has been happening to him.

I want nothing more than to visit him but i'am so scare how to react seing Liam in a wheelchair when i know how bouncy he once where just the thought makes me cry how could god be so cruel and hurt a angel like Liam.

I'am not ready and i have not told Karen i'am back in the UK i just need some time to get braver to see Liam.