please,
i beg you.
jesus, god, whoever, just let me die,
surely lying 6 feet underground, rotting away, in constant numbness, with no conscious or knowledge of anything is better than this.
i just cant live up to all these expectations, the constant disappointment scretches across their face. my mood, these feelings just make themselves present, intruding the decent time i was moving along with.
and to hurt her, and burden her with all my shit is just something I'd rather be dead than do.
i love her so much it hurts. and no boyfriend, or friends or art school can help me cure the buried pain.
blood shot eyes, teary cries, make me believe im just living a lie.
nothing helps, just momentarily distracts me, and then in a moment everything just comes crashing down, and i feel my world tear apart.
im just not worth it, I'm really not.
so when i cut or take pills just let it do its job.
let my arteries bleed out, let my vision spin till my little heart gives out.
i can't take this, i can't, so please.
I'm beggin you.
