Shawtown

Introduction

Minneapolis, Minnesota. Where the dotted citylights outshine the distant stars. The city never sleeps at night so the stars never shine. The city always made my string bean body feel so small and insignificant. Thousands upon thousands of people all hustling about their lives in floors upon floors of skyscrapers. My dejected eyes watched the lit up buildings pass my field of vision with music buzzing at a dangerously loud volume through my earphones into my eardrum as I attempted to drown out the pain in my chest, the lump in my throat, and the glistening tears in my eyes. I swallowed hard, breathed in deeply, and exhaled silently. I'd miss the excitement of the city.

I looked over to my mother. Her face was cold and motionless. she remained silent and fixated on the road. She appeared calm and collected, as always, but I knew she was just putting on her plastic mask while her brain was all scribbled and scrambled like scrambled eggs in a skillet.

I was sick of living in a family of plastic, wind-up dolls. My mother always held together her fake 'everything is just fine' composure. My stepfather's persuasive tongue always convinced everyone, including myself, that nothing was wrong. His manipulative mouth, laced with the stench of alcohol, chewing tobacco, and death, always convinced me that he treated me just fine, he had it much worse growing up, everything was completely fine, this is normal, and not to call the police. Behind the faded tan shade curtains of our nearly half a million dollar paper doll house with a little pond in the back yard was absolute hell. I still sometimes have flashbacks of the dark nights fueled by rage and alcoholism.

I no longer could stand it, so I began rebelling like any teenager would. My motives were different than most, however. I wanted to escape. I wanted to live in a healthy home. I never knew what that was like. So now, my mother was driving me to Eau Claire, Wisconsin to live with my biological father. I barely had contact with him for nearly a decade, but he instantly agreed to let me stay with him.