Crazy enough

Why not?

I may be only 17 but... I can bawl like I'm only 5. I sat there feeling my bottom lip quivering.. My mother downstairs not aware of what was about to happen before she walked in. I went back to my diary before I can let the tears fall

"Well diary I'm back... And I'm unsure what to tell now.. I can't let the tears fall because in the famous lyrics of Kelly clarkson "I can not cry, because I know that's weakness in your eyes" but yet I feel the need to.. For a girl my age I can keep my feelings bottled up pretty good! That's a trait most girls don't have nowadays. Which is why my parents never let me show my emotions.EVER! They always say " it's good to not let your feelings out it shows your brave., strong even." But they never know I cry alone at night because of what's happening.. Well I better head to bed before this gets to be too much.. Well bye? "

I finish writing the last words and close it and decide to go to bed. I change and see old scars and bruises caused by my horrid father.. You know he used to never be like this.. Once he was actually a caring nurturing father to his th- err two children. Never used to hit me never used to get drunk on a weekly basis. He drinks what? About 4-5 days a week? But he always does it when my mothers not around to hear my screams of terror and pain, whenever he gets mad at some stupid random thing... His excuse to abuse and neglect.

Hopefully one day I can get leave this hell behind.. FAR behind..