Musically-Inclined Lawyers: Heathers Edition

What's So Beautiful About Death?

Note: Everyone in this story is around the same age, besides the teachers and the parents.

Athena: September 7, 2023

Dear Diary: I think I'm a good person. I know there's some good in every person, knowing their feelings. But look at this, we're experiencing the first day of senior year!

I wonder what happened to everyone over the summer. It seems... harsher.

Students: Freak! Slut! Bug-eyes! Burnout! Poser! Lard-ass!

Athena: We were so confused,
Unknowingly used,
By those prosecuting brats.

Students: Freak! Slut! Loser! Shortbus!

Athena: Reading and writing,
Learning the right things,
Like guilty or innocent?

Students: Bull-dyke! Stuck-up! Hunchback!

Athena: Then we got older,
that was the boulder,
and we climbed right over here.

(Oh! Sorry!)

Welcome to this school,
This isn't a school,
This is a Courtroom.

Catch your breath,
Don't suffocate,
We're graduating soon.

Students: Dumb-ass!

Athena: College is our first Heaven
If we don't die by then!
But I know, I know, life will be beautiful.
I pray, I pray, for a blessing.
If we change again,
Then we'll be okay.
We'll be beautiful...

[Matt Engarde pushes Ema Skye to the floor.]

Ema: Ow!

Athena: But what's so beautiful about death?
Hey, you okay?

Ema: Get away from me, you weirdo!

Students: Freak! Slut! Cripple! Homo! Homo! Homo!

Athena: Things will get better
Soon as I get jobs
At some random law office.
Wake from this hell,
Wait for the bell,
Then I can get out of here.
Dream to go to Germany,
And meet lost relatives...

[Athena runs into Phoenix Wright.]

Phoenix: W-Watch where you're going!

Athena: Fight the urge to run away and commit mass genocide!

[Phoenix accidentally knocks over Athena's lunch tray.]

Phoenix: Oops! Sorry!

Athena: Phoenix Wright, lawyer slash artist. His fifth year of being the shyest kid in school, and BEING A HUGE KLUTZ.

Phoenix: Wh-what?

Athena: Nothing.

Athena and Students: But I know, I know, I know...
This can be beautiful.
I pray, I pray, I pray,
We would be okay.
We were here before,
We can stay here once more.
We can stay beautiful...